


WORTH WAITING FOR

by ksstarfire



Category: Starsky & Hutch
Genre: Anger, Angst, Confusion, Hurt, Lost Love, M/M, New love, Selfless Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-05
Updated: 2019-07-05
Packaged: 2020-06-13 01:02:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 22,079
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19588942
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ksstarfire/pseuds/ksstarfire
Summary: Starsky abruptly leaves Bay City and Hutch.Max fills in as Hutch's partner again. And lover?





	WORTH WAITING FOR

**Author's Note:**

> Max Collins is from my earlier story: "Dining At The Guilty Cafe".
> 
> SPECIAL and HUGE thanks to Megabat for the AWESOME, BEAUTIFUL cover pic!  
> AND for the wonderful help in teaching me how to post it!  
> YOU ROCK, Megabat!!

“Mrs. Starsky? This is Ashley Locke. I’m a friend of David’s. I need to talk to him. I don’t have his home number in Bay City, and I don’t want to call him at work. I need to have a private conversation with him. Yes, ma’am, it’s very important. Thank you for his number, Mrs. Starsky. Yes, after I’ve talked to him, I’m sure he will call you. Goodbye.”

~*~*~*~*~

Starsky picked up the ringing phone thinking it was Hutch. He was running late and was supposed to have been at his house thirty minutes ago.

“I’ll be there, Hutch. Got up late.”

“It’s not Hutch, David. It’s Ashley. Ashley Locke. We went out when you came back to New York four years ago. Remember?”

“Ashley? Yeah, I remember you.” Starsky smiled, remembering their date, and how it ended. “How are you?” Then he asked, “Why are you calling me?”

“There’s no easy way to say this, David, so I’m just going to say it. You’re a father. I got pregnant the night we went out together.”

Starsky was stunned into silence.

“David? Are you still there? David?”

“I’m a… father? You got pregnant? But we… I used a condom.” He swallowed and tried to figure out what to say next.

“Condoms break.”

“Is everything okay? Did you… is it a boy or a girl?”

“Everything is good. You have a son. Davey is a wonderful little boy. I wasn’t ever going to tell you, but I thought you should at least know. I’m not expecting anything from you. You know my family. There’s nothing I need that I can’t get.”

“A boy? I have a son? And you named him David?”

He heard her musical laugh. “Yes, you have a son. And of course I named him after you. He has light brown hair. He got my brown eyes, but he has your stubbornness.” She laughed again.

“I have to see him… you. I’ll be there tonight. Do you still live with your folks? I can catch a flight out and be there before dark. A son! I have a son!” Starsky laughed. “Does he know about me? What did you tell him?”

“I told him that his father was a police officer, and that you had to work far away. I told him I was going to call you. He seemed happy about it.”

“I gotta get off here and call the airlines. I’ll call you as soon as I get to Ma’s. Thank you, Ashley. For letting me know. Goodbye.”

“Goodbye, David.”

As soon as he heard the click of her hanging up, he dialed the airport. He got tickets on a flight out in two hours. He would have to hurry!

He picked up the phone and dialed quickly. “Captain Dobey, I won’t be at work for the next few days. I’m flying to New York in two hours. Sorry for the late call, but I just found out.”

“What? What’s going on?”

He hung up while Dobey was asking questions. Running to his bedroom, he grabbed his suitcase and began to throw clothes in it. As soon as it was packed, he called a cab. Five minutes later he was on his way to the airport.

~*~*~*~*~

Hutch stared at his pocket watch. Starsky was almost a half hour late. Maybe he’d forgotten. Maybe he thought they were both driving today? He dialed Starsky’s number but the phone just rang and rang.

“Starsky… I swear I am gonna…”

He walked out to his car and drove to the station.

He didn’t see the Torino in its normal spot. Nor did he see Starsky when he walked into the squad room. When he entered Dobey’s office, Hutch knew his Captain wasn’t happy.

“Cap’n, where’s Starsky?”

“Starsky had to fly back to New York. And before you ask, I don’t know what’s going on. He said he’d call me when he got there.”

“He didn’t tell you what was wrong? Was it his mother?”

“I said I didn’t know!” Dobey shouted. Starsky had just thrown a huge wrench in his plans.

“I was supposed to put you two on a stakeout for the feds! They’re expecting a record amount of heroin and cocaine to be coming into the city soon.”

“Look, Cap’n, I can work with one of the other detectives on this stakeout.”

“They are all assigned to other cases. There isn’t anyone I can pair you up with! And no, I am _not_ sending you out there alone!”

Dobey’s phone rang, interrupting his tirade.

“Dobey. Hello, Sam. What? Yes. I have the same issue here. And I have a federal stakeout to run. You can? Great. Yes, send him over. I’ll brief him when I brief Hutchinson.

“Looks like you’re in luck, Hutchinson. Remember Max Collins? Seems his partner broke his leg, so Sam is going to loan Max to us again. As soon as he gets here, I’ll brief you both. Then you go home, get some rest. You’ll be starting at six in the morning.”

“Thanks, Captain. Max and I work well together.”

Hutch went out to his desk and worked on finishing some reports while he waited for Max to arrive.

And waited for Starsky to call.

~*~*~*~*~

Starsky’s mind was going faster than the plane he was on. He kept thinking about the night he and Ashley had had sex. The condom was new. He’d just bought the package that morning. He tried to remember removing it. Had he noticed it leaking? He shook his head. The main thing was that he had a son. It was hard to wrap his mind around that concept.

He took a cab to his mother’s as soon as the plane landed. She was surprised to see him. He hugged her, picked her up, and twirled her around.

“David! Put me down! You know I am always happy to see you. But what are you doing here?”

“Ma, I’m a father!”

“What!?”

“Remember Ashley Locke? I went out with her when I was here four years ago. Well, she got pregnant. I have a son!”

“Davey? Why is she just now letting you know? Why didn’t she let you know right away?”

“I don’t know, Ma. As soon as I clean up a bit, I’m gonna’ go see her. She said she realized she should have told me right away. But the important thing is, she has told me!”

“Davey…”

“Don’t start, Ma. I know you didn’t like her. But she’s the mother of my child!” Starsky kissed his mother on the cheek, took his suitcase to his old room and changed clothes. He couldn’t wait to go meet his son.

~*~*~*~*~

Rachel watched her son walk away and shook her head. Something didn’t seem right to her.

~*~*~*~*~

“Hey, Hutch!”

Looking up, Hutch saw Max walking into the squad room. He stood up and went to meet him. They shared a tight hug then broke apart.

“How are you, Hutch? You’re looking great!”

“You too, Max! Damn, been a while. I’m doing well. Glad I get to work with you again. How are you?”

“I’m fine. So where’s Starsky? Why aren’t you working with him on this case?”

“Starsk had to fly back to New York today. Not sure what’s going on. Dobey said Starsky would call. So until then, I guess you’ll have to do.”

Both men laughed.

“Collins! Hutchinson! Get in here!”

Max grinned. “Some things never change.”

“You got that right.”

~*~*~*~*~

Starsky rang the doorbell of the lavish house. It seemed to be even bigger than he remembered. A maid answered the door.

“May I help you?”

“I’m David Starsky…”

“David!” Priscilla was suddenly in his arms, kissing him. “You came!”

“I told you I was flying out.” He tried to push her away, but she wasn’t moving back.

“Mrs. Cardigan, this is David Starsky. He’s Davey’s father. Make us some ice tea then bring it upstairs to the den.”

Starsky watched the maid nod and walk off. He noticed that Ashley still treated the hired help like… well the hired help. That was one of the things he now remembered not liking about her.

Starsky felt Ashley thread her arm through his. She walked them toward the grand staircase. As they ascended, he didn’t have the chance to say anything; she never stopped talking. She told him she had started attending college to get a law degree and realized she was pregnant. Her father had insisted she quit school and stay at home. He was worried that something might happen to the baby.

They reached the upstairs den and Starsky let her pull him down to sit beside her on the couch.

“Ash, where’s my son? I want to see him.”

“Mother took him to a birthday party. They’ll be back in about an hour. Meanwhile, we can get re-acquainted.”

He didn’t like it when she wrapped her arms around him, leaned in and started kissing him, over and over. He pulled away from her and stood up.

“Ash, slow down. We haven’t seen each other in four years. I came to meet Davey and see if everything was okay.”

“What’s wrong, David? You used to want me. I know my figure isn’t as great as it was then, but having a baby will do that to a woman.”

“You are still just as beautiful as ever, Ash.” He smiled at her.

“David? You… you aren’t married, are you?”

Feeling his face flush, Starsky shook his head ‘no’.

“Are you involved with another woman?”

Answering honestly, Starsky said, “No.”

“Then what’s the problem, David?”

“We’re just different people now. A lot has happened in four years. I want to take it slow.”

“Well, you might as well know, David. My father wants you to marry me. So Davey has a real father. So he has your last name. I didn’t think you would mind. You loved the sex between us.”

He could see tears forming in her eyes. He felt like a heel. But _marry her_? No. They could work out visitation. They didn’t have to be married for that. As he thought that, a large tear ran down her right cheek. Then one from her left eye. He saw her turn and throw herself on the couch and heard her sobbing.

“Ash… I haven’t seen you in four years. I… do have someone … sort of… in my life now.”

“But you said you didn’t have a woman in your life?!”

Feeling trapped, Starsky said the first thing that came to his mind. “It’s not serious. We just have sex now and then.” He closed his eyes, hoping Hutch never found out what he had just said. Loving Hutch and being loved by him was beyond anything he had ever felt before.

“Then she can just find some other man to have occasional sex with.”

Starsky was having trouble believing she was being so cold. And there wasn’t a sign that she had just been crying her heart out. Something wasn’t right here.

They heard the front door open and close downstairs.

“That will be my father. He said he wanted to talk to you as soon as he got home. You run on down to his office. It’s the door to the left of the stairs. We can talk after you talk to him.”

Stunned, Starsky walked down the stairs wondering what her father wanted to talk to him about. He knocked on the door and when Mr. Locke called ‘come in’, he opened the door and entered the plushly-appointed office.

He walked over to Mr. Locke and held out his hand. “Hello, Sir, I’m David Starsky. I don’t think we officially met four years ago.”

“Good to meet you, David. Ashley has told me a lot about you over the last four years. She said you are a homicide detective with the Bay City Police department.”

“Yes, Sir. Been there for six years now.”

“Dangerous work I would think.”

“It has its moments.”

“So, David, I have a proposition for you. I am looking for someone to head my security team for my businesses. The current head is retiring in two months. He would train you on everything you need to know before he left. Read this. It’s what I’m prepared to offer you if you accept the position. Once you and my daughter are married, you’ll need a job here in New York. Something a little less dangerous.” He handed a sheaf of papers to Starsky.

Taking the papers, Starsky glanced through them quickly, then went back to read them more slowly.

“Sir… this is a lot of money.”

“I’m aware of that. But I’ve always believed you get what you pay for. I’ve read about you in the Bay City papers. You are very good at what you do. Your arrest and conviction record is outstanding.”

“Well, my partner, Ken Hutchinson has a lot to do with that, Sir.”

“Don’t sell yourself short, David. Those papers list what your job duties would be and what your pay would be. Now, read these.”

Again Starsky reached out and took a set of papers. He read the first few paragraphs, stopped, and started reading again. The papers listed all the additional benefits he would receive if he accepted the job. A vacation home in Jamaica, use of a ski lodge in the Swiss Alps, a new car every year, and a new home for himself. And a home for his mother. He blinked.

“This is very generous, Sir, but…”

“It’s the same deal my current head of security was given. I believe if you are going to hire the best you need to give them the best. I also thought having your mother live close to you might ease your mind regarding her safety.”

“This is… this is a very generous offer, Mr. Locke.” Starsky decided to lay his cards on the table. “Does all this depend on my marriage to your daughter?”

“You just got here, David. Give it a few days. Meet your son, get reacquainted with Ashley, then make up your mind.”

They heard the doorbell chime three times and Mr. Locke smiled. “That will be Mrs. Locke and Davey. He loves to ring the doorbell.”

Starsky stood and followed Mr. Locke out of the office. He stopped dead when he saw a little boy laughing and dancing around the foyer. “Dear God… ” he whispered.

“Davey, come here you little scamp. There’s someone here who wants to meet you. He came all the way across the country just to see you.”

The boy ran to his grandfather who picked him up in his arms. He hid his face at first, then peeked at Starsky. “Davey, this is your father, David.”

“Papa?”

“Yes, your papa.”

Starsky was totally unprepared when the boy reached out his arms to him. He quickly took the young boy from his grandfather and they stared at each other. He did have his mother’s eyes. He didn’t really see much of himself in the boy, but he didn’t know a lot about toddlers.

When the boy continued to stare Starsky said, “Hello, Davey. It’s very nice to meet you.”

“Papa!” The boy buried his face in Starsky’s neck and wrapped his arms tightly around him. Starsky held him closely and felt on the verge of tears. He’d given up on the idea of ever having children. But now…

Starsky was so wrapped up in holding his son that he didn’t see Mr. and Mrs. Locke nod and smile at each other.

“Why don’t you take him upstairs, David? You and he can become better acquainted.”

“Thank you, Sir.” Starsky turned and carried his son up the stairs. His heart was all ready filling with love for this little miracle.

~*~*~*~*~

Hutch and Max left Dobey’s office and went to The Pits to talk about their assignment. They were to watch a house built in a new subdivision in the west part of Bay City. They would be in a house across the street. The house was fully furnished, so they would be staying there 24-7. Federal agents were in place in the house to the east of the house they would be in. The feds would watch during the night, and Max and Hutch would watch during the day.

“Hey, Huggy. Remember Max?”

Max reached out and shook Huggy’s hand. “Good to see you again, Huggy.”

“Likewise, Max.” Huggy looked from Hutch to Max. “Lot of blondness going on around here. Where’s Starsky? I need him to stand between the two of you so I don’t go blond-blind.” Huggy laughed.

“Starsky had to fly back to New York for some reason. I was hoping he might have called you. He usually calls me, but I haven’t heard anything yet.”

“No, he hasn’t called me.”

“Beers, Hug. Max and I have to talk about our new assignment.”

“Coming right up, gentlemen.”

Hutch and Max drank two beers and discussed how they wanted to work the surveillance. They had a secure phone line so they could talk to Dobey and the feds. The house had been stocked with food.

“So I guess we move in early tomorrow.” Max finished his beer.

“Might as well get settled.” Hutch finished his beer.

“I’ll pick you up about five in the morning. I think my car will fit into that neighborhood better than yours.” Max laughed.

Hutch laughed along with him. “You’re right about that. Our cover is good. We look like a couple of guys who work from our house for a company in Silicon Valley.”

They left Huggy’s. Hutch drove home and Max headed to the hotel he was staying in overnight.

~*~*~*~*~

The first thing Hutch did when he got home was check his answering machine. There were no messages on it. He got undressed and headed to the bathroom to take a shower. The entire time he was showering he was trying to figure out why Starsky had flown back East so suddenly.

And why he hadn’t called yet.

He dried off and walked out to the kitchen to get a beer. He thought about calling Starsky’s mother, but decided to wait. Starsky would call. He would know Hutch was worried.

Finishing his beer, Hutch headed to bed. He made sure the ringer on the phone by his bed was turned on high. He didn’t want to miss hearing it ring if Starsky called during the night.

~*~*~*~*~

The next morning, Hutch carried his suitcase downstairs when Max honked. He put it in the backseat with Max’s luggage and got in the front seat.

“Morning, Hutch. Did you hear from Starsky?”

“No. Nothing. But it’s only been a day. He may be busy with whatever’s going on there.”

“True. I’m sure he’ll call as soon as he has a chance.” Max headed toward the west side of Bay City. “Ready for this?”

“As ready as I can be. Hopefully, the feds are right and this goes down soon. Huggy’s going to stop by my place every day to water the plants. He’ll check the answering machine and get a message to me if… when Starsky calls.”

“Huggy is a good friend to have.”

“Yeah, he is. He was Starsky’s friend first, but he accepted me right away. He’s saved our asses more times than I can remember. Remind me to tell you about some of those times when we have nothing better to do during our shift.”

“You’re on.”

When they arrived at their cover house, Max drove the car into the open garage. He closed the door, and they took their bags into the house.

“Man, this place is a far cry from most of the undercover places I’ve been in.“ Max whistled as he walked through the front part of the house.

“Same here.”

They walked toward the back of the house. There were two bedrooms. “You want to pick one?” Max asked.

Shrugging, Hutch went into the bedroom on the right and unpacked his clothes.

Max did the same in his bedroom.

Both hurried to the dining room when they heard the phone ringing.

“Hutchinson.”

“This is Agent Stone. Settled in?”

“Yes. Any activity across the street?”

“As far as we know they all left the house this morning. We’ll watch from six in the evening to six in the morning. That okay with you two?”

“Sure, we’ll do the morning to evening shift.”

“The windows have mirrored surfaces, so you can stand there and look out day or night and no one will see you.”

“Good to know. I wondered how we could watch without being seen.”

“The phone number for our house is written on a pad by the phone. Don’t be heroes. You see something, you call. Got that?”

“Got it. Thanks, Stone.” Hutch hung up and filled Max in on what the agent had told him.

“Dang! And here I was planning on being a hero!”

Hutch laughed at Max. “Yeah, me too. They don’t want anyone taking their headlines. Starsky and I have done that more than once.”

“I’ve read those stories. Maybe the feds should have you and Starsky show them how you do it.”

“Yeah. Maybe. I sure wish I knew why Starsky flew back East.”

“He’ll call, Hutch. He’ll call.”

Taking turns at watching the house across the street, they spent some time checking out the food that had been stocked. By then it was noon, so Hutch fixed lunch, ate, then spelled Max for his lunch.

~*~*~*~*~

“There’s my two favorite men!”

Davey squirmed to get down, so Starsky reluctantly set him on his feet on the floor. He watched as Davey ran to his mother and hugged her.

“How’s my best boy? Was the party fun?”

They all sat on the couch and Davey told them about the party. He was really excited about the pony rides and quickly begged his mom for a pony. She told him she would think about it.

When Davey yawned and rubbed his eyes, Ashley said, “Time for you to lie down for a bit, young man.”

Starsky was surprised that Davey didn’t complain about taking a nap. He remembered his mother telling him stories of how much he had hated naps.

“You want to read him his nap-time story, David?”

Starsky’s face lit up. “Yeah. I’d like that.”

He followed them down the hall to Davey’s room. It was big, bright, and filled with toys which were all put up on shelves. There was a bookcase by the bed. Davey ran over to grab a book off the top of it. He handed it to Starsky.

“’The Prince And His Pony’.” Starsky chuckled. “You have a one-track mind, Davey.”

The little boy stood by an overstuffed chair and called out, “Papa, sit. Read.”

Starsky sat down and was touched when Davey promptly climbed into his lap and leaned against his chest. Ashley brought a light blanket over and covered Davey with it. Davey reached up and patted Starsky’s cheek. “Read, Papa.”

It was hard to do, but Starsky cleared his tight throat and began to read the story of a young prince who wanted a pony. The book must have been one of Davey’s favorite books because Starsky could tell it had been read a lot.

He was almost done with the story when he looked down and saw Davey was asleep, curled up on his lap. He had to blink his eyes to stop tears from falling at the trust this little boy had placed in him.

Starsky watched as Ashley walked over and scooped Davey into her arms. She carried him to the bed and tucked him under the covers as Starsky stood and continued to watch.

“He loves you all ready. I knew he would. I’ve told him about you ever since the day he was born.” Ashley stood close and hugged Starsky. “I knew you two would get along.” She kissed Starsky. “Let’s go across the hall to my room and talk.”

He didn’t really want to leave Davey. He wanted to stand there and watch him sleep. But he followed Ashley. As they walked out of Davey’s room a woman Starsky figured must be a nanny walked into it.

“That’s Isa. She’s been his nanny since birth. She’ll let us know if Davey wakes up. Come, sit down.” She walked to a plush couch and patted the cushion beside her.

Starsky sat down and Ashley practically climbed into his lap. She put her arms around him and laid her head on his shoulder. “I’ve missed you. Every time I look at Davey I would think about calling you, telling you. But I didn’t want to… Well never mind that. You’re here now. And Davey loves you. Just like I knew he would.”

“He’s amazing, Ash. I can’t get over how quickly he’s accepted me.”

“I had some pictures of you. From the Bay City newspapers. I’ve been showing them to him since he was born. I told him all about you. When he started to talk, and knew what to say, he would ask where you were. ‘ _Where’s Papa?_ ’ And I would tell him about you being on the police force. I never told him that you didn’t know about him. But he’s older now. He understands more. So I thought it was time… past time… that I let you know.”

“I’m glad you did, Ash. Thank you.”

“Did you and Daddy have a good talk?”

Closing his eyes, Starsky remembered everything her father was offering him. “He made a very generous offer.”

“He’s very impressed with your career. When he found out Mister Clane was going to retire, he asked me if I thought you would accept the position. I told him I thought it would be perfect for you. You’d be close to your mother… and to Davey.”

“Look, Ash. I need to think about this. It’s a big deal to leave Hu… home and move here.”

“I understand, David. I don’t mean to push you. I just want to see Davey… and you… happy.”

Starsky stood up with Ashley in his arms. He stood her on her feet and placed a quick kiss on her lips. “I’m going to head back over to Ma’s.”

“Stay for dinner. I’ll have cook fix whatever you want.”

“Thanks, but I told Ma I’d be back for dinner. I’ll come back over early tomorrow. I’ve got a lot to think about. When Davey wakes up tell him I’ll see him in the morning.”

“Okay, David.” She reached up and kissed him. Then she walked him down the stairs to the front door.

When he opened the door he saw a limo parked there.

“Charles will take you back to your mother’s.”

“I could call a cab.”

“No need for that, David.”

The chauffer opened the back door and Starsky slid onto the plush leather seat. “I need to go to…”

“I know, Mister Starsky.”

And with that, the limo pulled out of the drive.

Starsky closed his eyes and remembered the feel of holding his son in his arms, and reading to him. He briefly thought about Hutch, but his thoughts quickly went back to Davey… his son.

~*~*~*~*~

Max and Hutch settled into their routine seamlessly. They had wondered why they were watching during the day and the feds took the night shift. Max said he thought it was because the federal agents figured the bust would go down at night and wanted all the glory.

“You could be right about that, Max.”

They spent a lot of time catching up on each other’s lives as they watched out the windows. They traded funny work stories and kept each other entertained.

But Max could tell Hutch was missing Starsky.

~*~*~*~*~

Starsky spent most of his days with Ashley and Davey. She continued to push for intimacy, but he kept telling her ‘no’. Davey was a delight, and Starsky fell a little more in love with him every day. He would sit, with Davey on his lap, and read to him for as long as Davey could stay awake. Then Starsky would just hold him and look at the miracle in his arms.

The fourth day he was there, he knew he had to make a decision. So he called Captain Dobey and told him he had to quit. He refused to give Dobey any details, just that he needed to stay in New York. He promised to fly back to Bay City in a week or two and formalize everything.

He thought about calling Huggy and asking him to take the police radio, siren, and MARS light out of the Torino and deliver it all to Parker. But that could wait.

It was time to talk to Ashley’s father.

~*~*~*~*~

A few days later, Max was fixing sandwiches for lunch while Hutch was keeping an eye on the house across the street.

“Max!”

“What is it Hutch?” Max quickly walked out of the kitchen and over to the window.

“A delivery truck? Hutch, you think…?”

“Yeah, I do. Call the feds. I’m taking pictures of everyone going into that house. And tell them to call and check out ‘New Home Deliveries’ while they’re at it.”

“On it.”

Max hung up the phone. “They said for us to sit tight. They’ll handle the bust. I guess they don’t want us to show them up.”

Both men laughed. But both also pulled out their guns and checked that they were ready for use. Just in case.

Hutch continued to take pictures as the feds moved in. He and Max relaxed as they saw the last suspect being put into a squad car and taken in.

“Hey, Hutch, why don’t you take off? I can wrap things up here with the feds and I’ll write up our report for Dobey. Go. See if you can get in touch with Starsky and find out what’s going on.”

“Thanks, Max. You sure?”

“I’m sure. Here, take my car.” Max tossed his keys to Hutch. “I’ll grab a ride back to the station with one of the feds or a black and white.”

“I appreciate this, Max. I’m really worried about him. It’s not like him to not call and let me know what’s going on.”

“I understand that. Go on. I’ll come over after I get done at Parker to get my car. Maybe have a beer or two?”

“Sounds good to me.”

Hutch went into the bedroom he had been using and quickly packed his stuff. He waved at Max as he went out to the garage, got into Max’s car, and headed home.

~*~*~*~*~

Hutch ran up the stairs at Venice Place. He grabbed a beer from the fridge then sat down on the couch. Dialing Rachel Starsky’s number he waited while the phone rang. Maybe Starsky would answer the call…

“Hello.”

“Hi, Rachel. It’s Hutch. Is Starsky there?”

“Hello, Ken! It’s good to hear from you. But I’m sorry, Starsky isn’t here right now. He and Ashley went out to look at a house that Ashley’s father wants to buy them as a wedding present.”

“What? Who’s Ashley? And… married? Is S-S-Starsk married?”

Gripping the receiver tightly, Rachel took a deep breath. “Ken, didn’t David call you?”

“I haven’t heard from him since the day before he flew back there.”

“Oh, dear.”

“Rachel, please tell me what’s going on. I’ve been really worried.”

“I’m sorry. I don’t know how to tell you…”

“Just tell me. Please?”

“Remember four years ago, when David came to help me through that surgery? He went out with a girl he used to date. Ashley. She… she called me to get David’s number.

“Ashley got pregnant. She decided David needed to know about his son. So she called him. David is going to marry Ashley and go to work as the head of security for her father’s corporation.”

Hutch sat still, barely able to breathe through the pain that tightened around his chest. He put his beer on the coffee table.

“I… I have to go. Thank you for telling me, Rachel. T-t-take care of yourself.”

“Ken… Hutch?”

~*~*~*~*~

He hung up the phone and ran to the bathroom. He slid to his knees in front of the commode and emptied his stomach. He vomited over and over, even after his stomach had no more to expel. He didn’t realize he was crying until he finally stood up and looked in the mirror.

He grabbed a towel, wet one end of it, and wiped his face. Turning away from the mirror, he walked into his bedroom and sat on the side of the bed. He stood back up, remembering making love to Starsky there the day before Starsky had left for New York.

In a flash of anger, Hutch stripped the sheets off the bed, balled them up, and threw them in the trash can in the kitchen. When he turned around, he saw a framed photo of Starsky and him standing on top of the Torino. He grabbed it and flung it at the wall. The glass and frame shattered. He could see the picture had torn in half leaving Starsky on one side and himself on the other.

The rage stopped as suddenly as it had started.

He walked over and sank onto the couch.

“Why, Starsk? Why didn’t you call me? Why didn’t you tell me?”

Leaving Max’s keys on the dining room table, Hutch ran out of his apartment. When he got in his car he really didn’t know where he was going. He found himself pulling into The Pits’ parking lot with no recollection of driving there.

“Hutch! Heard on the news about a big bust. That you guys?”

Walking to the booth he and Starsky always shared, Hutch dropped onto one of the benches. He didn’t look up at Huggy.

“Whiskey. Bring the bottle. And leave me alone.”

“You okay, Hutch? Did the bust go bad? Is Max…”

“Are you going to bring me what I asked for, or do I need to find a new bar?”

Hutch saw Huggy quickly turn away to hide the hurt on his face. He watched him walk to the bar, grab a glass and the bottle and walk back to the booth where he sat.

“You want to talk about whatever’s eating you?”

“No.” Hutch picked up the bottle and filled the glass with the amber liquid. He drank half the contents then refilled it.

Huggy realized Hutch wasn’t ready to talk yet, so he walked back to bar. “Diane, keep an eye on Hutch. I need to make a couple phone calls. Come get me if… well, just come get me.”

“Sure, Huggy.”

~*~*~*~*~

Diane walked over to the booth where Hutch sat. She watched as Hutch drained his glass and refilled it. His face looked like it was carved in stone. But his eyes… his eyes were bleak.

“Hutch? You okay?”

“Yes. Get me another bottle.”

“I don’t think…”

“This is a bar. Get me another bottle. There’s nothing to think about!”

She walked to the bar. But before she took the bottle to Hutch, she walked back into Huggy’s office.

“Huggy, Hutch asked for another bottle. I’ve never seen him like this.”

“Yeah, I dig that. I haven’t been able to find out anything.”

“Maybe you should call Starsky?”

“Starsky’s back in New York.” Huggy tried to figure out what to do. “Max! I’ll see if I can get hold of Max. Give me that bottle. I’ll take him a different bottle. We need to keep him here until I can find Max.”

“What’s wrong with the bottle I have?”

“The one I’ll take him will be three-fourths water.”

Diane walked out to see Hutch standing up from the booth. “Hutch, Huggy’s coming with your bottle. Sit down. You want a clean glass?”

~*~*~*~*~

Hutch sat back down, as Huggy walked out with an opened bottle. He took it from Huggy and filled his glass. He held the glass up in a toast to Diane. “Nope.”

~*~*~*~*~

It was late when Starsky got back to his mother’s place. He had quit his job as a detective with the Bay City Police department. Then he had committed to taking the position Mr. Locke had offered him. “I guess that means I’m going to be marrying Ash.”

He stood on the stoop for a while. Finally, walking up the stairs, he used his key to quietly open the door to his mother’s apartment. He didn’t want to wake her up. There would be plenty of time to talk tomorrow.

He had just closed and locked the door when a lamp beside the sofa came on. He saw his mother sitting there looking sad.

“Ma! What are you doing up? Why were you sitting here in the dark? Are you all right?”

“No, Davey, I’m not ‘ _all right’_. And I was sitting here waiting for you to get home. Sit down. I need to talk to you.”

Starsky slowly walked over and sat in the chair across the coffee table from his mother. “What’s wrong, Ma?”

“Why did you tell me you had called Ken? Why did you lie to me?”

“Ma, I was going to call him. I just needed some time. I needed to figure out what I was going to do before I talked to him.” Starsky felt sweat pop out on his forehead. Something was really wrong here.

“David Michael Starsky! How could you treat Ken like that? Making him wait. Making him worry about you.” Rachel closed her eyes and took a deep breath. “I’ve known for some time that he loves you. And that you love him. As more than just friends and partners. I’ve known that the two of you are lovers.”

“Ma!?”

“Shut up, son. Listen to me. What I can’t understand is why you would leave Bay City, and Ken, without talking to him. Without telling him what was going on. That man _loves_ you! More than anyone else in the world, other than me. And you just walked away from him like he was less than nothing! Is that what I can expect someday soon?”

“Ma? No!”

“’ _No_ ’? Why not? You love Ken but threw him away. You say you love me. Should I be waiting for the day you no longer want to come to see me? No longer call me? When you no longer love me?”

“Never, Ma! I swear it! Look, I’ll call Hutch first thing in the morning. Promise.”

“You don’t have to.”

“Why?” Starsky hadn’t seen his mother look so sad since his father had been killed. She looked like she was about to cry.

“Ken called here today. He asked to speak to you. I thought you had talked to him, so I told him you had gone out with Ashley to look at a house her father wanted to buy for you two… as a wedding present. He didn’t have any idea what I was talking about. He asked me to tell him what was going on. I told him about Ashley, about the job offer, and I told him about Davey.”

“What… what did he say?”

“He didn’t. He just quietly hung up the phone.”

“Oh, God… Hutch.”

“A little late to be worried about him now, don’t you think? I do not understand this at all, Davey. Explain to me how you could be so cruel to Ken. How many times has he taken your side? Had your back? How many times has that man saved your life by risking his own? And you repay him by walking away from him? Without giving a thought to what this would do to him?

“I am very disappointed in you, son. I am angry that, because you lied to me, I was the one to break Ken’s heart. You know I have always loved him. Always looked at him like a son.

“And my heart aches for what Ken is going through right now.”

“I’m sorry, Ma… I…”

“I’m not sure I am ready to forgive you. And it’s really Ken you should be telling how sorry you are. But I’m not sure he can or will forgive you for this either.

“I’m beyond tired. I’m going to bed. I would wish you a ‘good night’, but I hope it’s not a ‘good’ night. I hope what you have done, the pain you have caused someone just because he loves you, keeps you up all night.”

Starsk watched as his mother stood and walked to her bedroom, quietly shutting the door behind her.

Starsky sat on the chair and dropped his head into his hands. “Ma’s right. I don’t deserve a good night’s sleep. God… Hutch.”

~*~*~*~*~

Huggy sat across from Hutch and watched him drink the watered-down whiskey. Every time he asked Hutch something Hutch would threaten to find some other place to drink. So he sat quietly and prayed for Max to get there quickly.

“Want me to make you something to eat, Hutch? A sandwich? Some soup? You should eat something if you’re gonna drink like that.”

“Why don’t you go to New York and find your friend Starsky? Maybe you can fix _him_ something to eat while you have a laugh at good old gullible Hutch!”

Huggy stood up as he saw Max walking into the bar. He hurried over to talk to him before Max could get to Hutch. “I don’t know what happened to him, but he’s downed one bottle of whiskey, and is working on a second that’s watered-down. He won’t talk to me. Max, I ain’t never seen him like this before.”

“Thanks for leaving messages for me. Dobey caught me. You don’t have any idea what set this off? I told him to head home from the bust, try to get in touch with Starsky. When I got to Hutch’s he was gone.” Max said nothing about finding a set of sheets in the trash, or the shattered picture.

“You think he talked to Starsky?”

“I think he talked to someone, but not sure if it was Starsky.”

They turned at a sound from the booth Hutch was sitting in. They saw Hutch slumped over the table. He had knocked the bottle over.

“Help me get him out to the car, Huggy.”

Between them they were able to get him out of the bar and into the front seat of Max’s car.

“I’ll drop off Hutch’s car after I close up tonight, Max. You think he should see a doctor? I don’t know if he drank anything before he got here, but he’s had a full bottle plus some since he got here.”

“When I get him home, I’ll check to see if it looks like he drank anything there. Thanks, Huggy.”

“Just take care of him.”

“I will. Promise.”

~*~*~*~*~

Starsky tossed and turned all night. Every time he closed his eyes he saw Hutch’s face.

He finally got up, made his way to the kitchen, looked under the sink, and found a bottle of whiskey. He poured himself a glass then sat in the dark drinking it. “God, I’m sorry, Hutch.”

~*~*~*~*~

Max had rolled the windows down in the car. So when they got to Hutch’s, Hutch was awake enough to make it up the stairs with Max’s help. He was quiet. Too quiet, Max thought.

They walked in and Max told Hutch to go wash his face while he fixed him something to eat. He watched Hutch walk toward the bathroom. Hutch’s shoulders were drooping. Whatever had made Hutch go off the deep end must have been terrible.

Hutch came out of the bathroom and sank down on the couch. He stared at the floor, not moving.

Max walked in and put a coffee mug full of chicken noodle soup and a plate with a grilled cheese sandwich on the coffee table in front of Hutch.

“Not hungry. Don’t want it.”

“I know, but you need something in your stomach. You downed a lot of whiskey at Huggy’s. Eat. Please?”

Max watched as Hutch picked up the sandwich and took a small bite. Max saw Hutch shudder and guessed he was feeling sick. “Try a bit of the soup, Hutch. Maybe that will settle your stomach and then you can eat the sandwich.”

Happy that Hutch picked up the mug and took a few sips, Max didn’t remark when Hutch said, “I don’t want any more. You can leave. I’ll be okay.”

“Did you talk to Starsky?”

“No.”

“Did you talk to someone? Is Starsky all right?”

“Why do you care?”

“Hutch, that’s not fair. You know how I feel about you. That hasn’t changed since the last time we worked together. Talk to me. What happened?”

Max saw Hutch’s brief flare of anger fade. He saw his shoulders drop again and watched as he leaned back against the back of the couch.

“I talked to Starsky’s mother.”

“Hutch, I swear, it’s harder getting information from you than it is most criminals. What did she tell you?”

“Why am I so unlovable?”

“What?”

“Why am I so unlovable, Max?”

“I’m not sure what you’re asking, Hutch. Is Starsky okay?”

He heard Hutch give a sad laugh.

“He’s fine. He has a son and is getting married. Or maybe he’s already married. I didn’t wait to find out. I didn’t want to know.” He paused and Max saw him look up. “Tell me, why am I so unlovable?”

“Hutch… I don’t know… why Starsky… what happened with him, but I can tell you that you are loveable. You are very loveable.”

Hutch snorted. “Doesn’t seem like it to me.”

“Look, Hutch, why don’t you finish the soup and get some rest. We can talk about this in the morning.”

He watched as Hutch picked up the cup and drank all of it. Then ate half of the sandwich.

Hutch looked up at Max.

“You don’t want to make love to me… do you?”

“You know that’s a lie, Hutch. If things had worked out differently, we’d have become lovers the last time we worked together. We’d still be lovers.”

Leaning over, Hutch wrapped his arms around Max and started kissing him.

Max closed his eyes and kissed him back for a few seconds. Then he pushed Hutch back. “Not like this, Hutch. You need to be sure.”

“I am sure.”

“Then tomorrow, when you’re sober, we’ll talk about it. Hutch… this… _you…_ are worth waiting for.”

Max met Hutch’s gaze. He let his feelings show. He was finished hiding how he felt.

Hutch nodded.

Max helped him stand and walk to the bedroom. He made sure Hutch got into the bed. He walked into the bathroom, got some aspirin out of the medicine cabinet and took them and a glass of water into Hutch. “Take these. I’ll be on the couch. Call me if you get sick or need anything. Good night, Hutch.”

He watched Hutch take the aspirin. He took the glass back into the bathroom and refilled it. He walked back into the bedroom to set it on the nightstand and looked down at Hutch.

Hutch was asleep all ready. 

Standing there for a few minutes, Max looked at Hutch. “This time, nothing will stop me from making love to you.” He walked out to the living room, took some blankets and a pillow out of the closet. He put them on the couch and sank down on it.

“Tomorrow, Hutch utHH. Tomorrow.” 

~*~*~*~*~

Starsky slept a little. When he woke early the next morning, he left his mother a note and walked to a nearby park. He needed to think. And decide what to do. He loved Hutch, but he also loved his son. He knew Ashley wouldn’t share custody of Davey with him. Not with him living on the opposite coast.

His only option, if he wanted to be in his son’s life, was to marry her, make the best of it so he could be with Davey.

Now if he could just figure out what to say to Hutch.

He dreaded seeing Hutch, maybe hurting him more, but he had to see him. Had to try to explain. Had to ask for forgiveness, even though he doubted he would receive it.

On the note he’d left his mother, he told her if Ashley called to tell her he’d talk to her the next day.

He stood up and began walking, having no destination in mind. He tried to picture what his future would be like but kept seeing Hutch in his mind. He saw him laughing, filled with passion, steely eyed when facing down a perp… then he saw him devastated after Gillian had been killed. He knew Hutch would look worse now.

He bit his lip to keep from crying.

“Hutch… I’m so sorry.”

Looking up, he found himself in front of a bar that was already open. He walked in and ordered a beer. Picking up the glass the bartender placed in front of him, he took a drink. He thought to himself, “not enough alcohol in the world to make this better.”

Late that evening, he returned to his mother’s place.

“I’m going to go lay down for a while.”

“I fixed some soup. Why don’t you eat something first?”

He hugged her. “Maybe later. Thank you. Ma… I’m sorry. I wish…”

“I know, Davey. I wish too.”

~*~*~*~*~

Hutch slept through the night. Max had been up a few times to check on him. He was glad Hutch was getting rest.

When Max woke up, he looked in on Hutch and saw he was still sleeping soundly. He checked the kitchen for supplies and quickly ran to the closest grocery store. When he returned he started making something for Hutch to eat. It was almost done when he heard Hutch get up and go to the bathroom.

He made sure nothing would burn and went to stand in the bedroom doorway. When Hutch came out of the bathroom, he had his red robe and a pair of pajama pants on. Max saw the dark shadows under Hutch’s eyes and vowed to chase them away.

“Morning, Hutch. How are you feeling this morning?”

Hutch rubbed his face. “Like I got shot then run over by a truck.”

“Come on. I have breakfast ready for you.”

“No food. Not sure I can eat yet.”

“Promise. It will make you feel better.”

Hutch followed Max into the kitchen.

“Sit down. I’ll dish it up.”

Max grabbed the whole wheat toast that had just popped up from the toaster and lightly buttered it. Then he drizzled honey on it. He set the toast in front of Hutch and turned to the stove. He dished up a bowl of oatmeal. He dropped some chopped dates in it and stirred. He put it in front of Hutch along with a banana.

“You didn’t have to go to this much trouble, Max.”

“It wasn’t any trouble. And it’s all good for you. I have a friend who is a doctor in an emergency room. He taught me what was best to eat for a hangover. Oh, and scrambled eggs are good too. Do you want me to make some for you?”

“No. This looks good. Are you going to make coffee?”

“Coffee’s not good for your body right now.” Max got up and filled a large glass with water which he set in front of Hutch. “Water’s best.” Max sat down across the table from Hutch and watched him eat.

“I never thought about putting dates in oatmeal. They’re good.”

When Hutch drank the full glass of water, Max stood up and refilled it.

“Aren’t you going to eat?”

“I had a bowl of oatmeal and a banana while you were in the shower.”

It surprised Hutch that he ate everything Max had made for him. And surprised him even more that his stomach wasn’t rebelling. Now if his head would stop pounding.

As if reading Hutch’s mind, Max laid two aspirin on the table by Hutch’s plate.

“Thanks.”

“Welcome.”

Standing up when he had taken the aspirin, Hutch started to clear the table.

“Go sit down. I’ll take care of this and be right behind you. Go. This won’t take long.”

~*~*~*~*~

Hutch walked into the living room and sat on the couch. He realized soft jazz was playing on the stereo. He tipped his head back to rest against the back of the couch and tried not to think about what had happened.

He wished… he didn’t know what he wished right now.

~*~*~*~*~

Max finished in the kitchen and walked in to sit down about a foot away from Hutch. He didn’t want to crowd him right now.

“Want to talk about it?”

“Not really, but I guess you have a right to know.”

“I don’t need to know. But I’m willing to listen if you need to tell someone.”

Max watched Hutch close his eyes. He could tell Hutch was thinking about it. He hoped Hutch would realize that telling someone would help.

Hutch opened his eyes and looked down at the floor.

“When I called his mother’s place, she answered. She told me what was going on. Starsky went to New York because he found out he has a four-year-old son there. He and the baby’s mother are getting married. Starsk is going to work for her father.” Hutch paused and swallowed. “Her father is buying them a house as a wedding present.”

“Hutch… I’m so sorry. I don’t know what to say.” Max wanted nothing more than to pull Hutch close and hold him tight. “I… why didn’t he… Sorry. Not my business. I’m sorry.”

“It’s all right, Max. I… I just don’t understand why he… why he didn’t tell me. Or call me. I thought… I thought we would be together forever.”

Max saw Hutch blinking away his tears.

“I feel so… unlovable.”

“You said that last night. But you are wrong, Hutch. You are lovable.”

“Doesn’t seem like it to me.”

Max leaned close to Hutch. He raised his right hand and cupped Hutch’s cheek, caressing it. Closing the distance between them, Max pressed his lips to Hutch’s, gently kissing him. He pulled back, even though he wanted to press harder, slip his tongue inside those lips.

“Max… ”

“Too soon? I’m sorry.” Max moved away from Hutch.

“I… I liked it.”

“More?”

This time it was Hutch who closed the distance between them. He kissed Max and put his arms around his shoulders.

“I… I don’t know... ”

“What don’t you know, Hutch?”

“If I can do this. I mean, I had feelings for you… before… but then Starsky and I… ”

“Hutch, I understand that. I don’t want to push you. If we make love or don’t, I will still be your friend. I’ll still try to help you through this.”

“I… want to… but there are so many memories… ”

“Maybe all that means is that I’m going to have to love you until you can’t remember anyone but me and any time but now.”

Max pulled Hutch closer to him on the couch and kissed him deeper.

Then Max let Hutch set the pace. Even though his cock was feeling strangled by his jeans, he wasn’t going to rush.

After a few minutes, Hutch pulled back. He looked into Max’s eyes, took a deep breath and said, “I want you. I want you to make love to me. Not to forget Starsky, but to… move on.”

“I understand, Hutch. And I am more than willing. I want you to understand something. Any time you want me to stop, just say so. I’ll stop. I promise. Stand up for me?”

Hutch stood up and looked at Max.

Pulling Hutch into his arms, Max began to dance with him to the slow jazz tune floating through the air. He left some space between them but shortly Hutch moved closer and put his head on Max’s shoulder. Max tipped his head to rest against Hutch’s. They were evenly matched in height and danced together as if they had been doing it for years.

At the end of the second song, Max moved back. He untied the robe and slipped it off Hutch’s shoulders. He laid it on the couch and stepped back. Reaching out with both hands, he mapped Hutch’s chest, skimming lightly over the soft flesh, feeling the muscles and bone underneath.

“God, Hutch… your skin is like velvet poured over hard steel.”

He looked up to see a light blush on Hutch’s face. “Didn’t mean to make you blush. I’ve been told I talk too much when making love with someone, but I want that person to know what moves me, what pleases me, what draws me to them.” Max’s voice carried traces of a Russian accent as he spoke.

“Your accent is showing.”

“You bring it out in me.”

He leaned in and pressed kisses across Hutch’s chest, pausing to lightly suck on each of his nipples.

Max knew Hutch was watching him. He heard Hutch moan when he sucked on his nipples. He kept the kisses and touches gentle. Max straightened up and kissed Hutch softly. “Okay?”

“Y… yes.”

Max carefully untied the string of the pajama pants Hutch was wearing and pushed them down his legs. “Step out for me, please.”

Max felt Hutch put his hand on his shoulder to step out of the pants. He saw Hutch kick them to the side. He watched as Hutch blushed again then brought his hands in to cover his groin.

“Please, Hutch, don’t. Don’t hide anything from me. You are so beautiful. Don’t misunderstand. I see you as all man. But beautiful too. You are strong. But you have a tender heart. You can be fierce, but also sweet. You amaze me. I don’t know where to start. This has been a fantasy of mine since I met you. Do I start at the top and work my way down? Or start at the bottom and work my way up?”

Slowly moving his hands back to his sides, Hutch stood there, totally exposed.

“I need to make things even.” Max stepped back and removed all of his clothes and stood in front of Hutch naked, just like Hutch was. He stood there while Hutch’s eyes caressed his body. He had to remind himself to take things slowly.

If he could.

“Where was I? Trying to decide where to start? With your mouth, your chest…

“Or start here…” Max reached out and took Hutch’s penis in his hand. He closed his eyes and stroked from base to tip. But he had to open his eyes to watch that beautiful cock grow.

“Damn, Hutch!” He dropped to his knees and took the penis into his mouth, licking and sucking, pulling almost off, kissing the tip, then sucking it deep again. He couldn’t stop his moans. And he heard Hutch’s too. 

Max looked up and saw Hutch looking down. Max was shaking with his passion.

“Max?”

Max slowly pulled off Hutch’s cock. “Sorry. I, um, I got a bit carried away there. The taste of you makes me crazy.” He smiled at the blond.

“You were making me pretty crazy too.”

“Would it… could we… go to the bedroom?”

Max was surprised when Hutch reached out and took his hand in his. He followed Hutch into the bedroom and watched him pull the sheets down. He saw Hutch hesitate only for a moment then sit on the bed, swing his legs up and scoot to the middle of the bed.

“Are you sure about this, Hutch? We don’t have to do anything. I’m happy just being with you.”

“I want this. I want you, Max.”

Max got on the end of the bed. His eyes traced up Hutch’s legs, torso, and settled on Hutch’s eyes. “Open your legs for me?” When Hutch opened his legs, Max moved between them, kissing his way up the inside of each leg. When he reached Hutch’s groin, he scooted his hands under Hutch’s balls and brought them up so he could lick, then suck them into his mouth. He smiled to himself when Hutch groaned.

“Max… really… you don’t have to… ”

“I know, but I want to. I’m going to love giving pleasure to you.”

He took Hutch’s cock in his hand and kissed up from the bottom, darting out his tongue to lick as he moved up toward the tip. He paid special attention to the bottom of the crown. Sucking the head into his mouth he teased the slit with his tongue before pulling it in further. Hearing Hutch moan again, he moved his mouth up and down, licking and sucking as he moved on it. 

He’d wanted to make this slow… make it last… but finally touching Hutch… tasting him… was playing havoc with his control. He was hard and hurting, but wanted this to be all for Hutch.

“God, Max! Let… let me…”

Pulling off for a minute, Max smiled at Hutch. “Next time. This time is all for you.”

Max started over, in earnest. This time, he rolled Hutch’s balls and rubbed his finger against Hutch’s perineum. He saw Hutch fisting the sheets in both hands. He could tell Hutch was close… so very close.

Hutch’s hips lifted off the bed and as Max felt the first spasm, he sucked Hutch’s cock as deep as he could and milked it gently with his tongue. Hutch’s cry of ecstasy was music to his heart. Pleasing this man was his number one priority.

Slowly, Hutch came down off his high. Max slid to Hutch’s side and moved up in the bed. He pulled Hutch against him and murmured calming words in his ear, his Russian accent still very noticeable.

Hutch opened his eyes and smiled at Max. “That was… incredible. Thank you. Let me… “

“Not this time, Hutch.” He leaned in and kissed the blond. When he pulled back, he said, “Roll over for me.”

Max saw Hutch hesitate then roll over onto his stomach. He picked a bottle up off the nightstand. He knew Hutch was wondering what he would do.

Squeezing some lotion into his hands Max rubbed them together to warm it. He began to massage Hutch’s shoulders and back with it, working all the tension out of his soon-to-be lover’s body. He stroked in time with the song that was playing on the radio, humming along at times. Then he moved down and massaged Hutch’s legs. When they seemed boneless, he moved up the bed and worked on each arm.

He put the bottle of lotion back on the nightstand, slid his body next to Hutch’s, and reached down to pull the covers over them. Once they were covered, he pulled Hutch closer against him and kept his arms around him.

“Max? Why don’t you want to make love to me?”

Max reached out and took Hutch’s hand in his. Moving their hands to his groin, he let Hutch feel his hard cock. “Does this feel like I don’t want to make love to you?”

He had to lift Hutch’s hand off his cock or he was going to go off like a rocket.

“Max… “

“Shhhh. There’s no rush. You’re relaxed. Go to sleep. You need rest. Morning is soon enough for more.” He bent his head and kissed Hutch’s shoulder. Within minutes he heard a soft snore. Making himself relax was a bit harder, but he soon followed Hutch into slumber.

~*~*~*~*~

“Ashley, we’re going to get married next week.”

“Next week? But I need to get a dress, and flowers, and send out invitations, and…”

“We’re going to the courthouse and have a judge marry us.”

“But, David…”

“And I am having a pre-nuptial agreement drawn up. We will both sign it. I will support you and Davey with what your father will pay me. Your money will be yours to do with as you like. And if… should… we not stay married, it will spell out custody and visitation.”

“David! There’s no need for that! Father will make sure we can live comfortably. We won’t ever have to worry about money.”

“I’m used to earning my way, not taking handouts. So, this is not negotiable.” He saw Ashley mentally switching gears and braced himself for her next argument.

“We can work all that out, David. And no talk of us not being together, I love you. We will make a wonderful couple and celebrate our fiftieth anniversary. I only plan to be married once… to you. So I want it to be special. I want the full wedding. Shower, bridesmaids, flowers, just everything!”

“Look, Ashley, I like you and I love our son, but this marriage isn’t some grand romance. I’ll always treat you with respect and take care of you and Davey, but don’t be weaving fairy tales about our marriage. We’ll get along. And make it work.”

“’ _Make it work’_? You talk like this is a job!”

“It’s been four years since I’ve seen you, Ash. It’s going to take some time for me to get to know you again. And you me. We have an appointment to meet with Judge Wills on Thursday next week at two. We pick up the license Tuesday.”

“But… what about our honeymoon?”

“I told your father I would start work on Monday after the wedding.” He braced himself for what he had to say next. 

“I need to fly back to Bay City to clean out my apartment and finalize things with my old boss. I’ll do that day after tomorrow. You and Davey are welcome to fly back to California with me if you want.”

“Davey is too young to fly! And what are we supposed to do while you pack up your stuff? Honestly, David, you can afford to buy everything new.”

Starsky tried really hard to keep his temper under control. He managed… barely. “Ashley… I have things that mean a lot to me back in California. I’m not going to just walk away from everything.”

He cringed inside, remembering that that was just what he had done… walked away from Hutch, without a word of explanation. He doubted Hutch would even speak to him, but he had to try. At the very least, he had pictures of the two of them that he would not trash just to make Ashley happy.

“Let’s go into Davey’s room and I’ll read to him for a while. I want to spend time with him before I fly back home… uh, to Bay City.

”~*~*~*~*~

Starsky went back to his mom’s that afternoon. He needed to call Huggy and didn’t want to make the call from Ashley’s.

He dialed Huggy’s number by heart.

“It’s The Pits, where you can sits, but better not spits. How may I direct your call?”

Chucking, Starsky replied, “Hey, Hug! That’s one I haven’t heard before.”

“Who is this?”

“Funny, Hug. You know who this is.” Starsky held his breath hoping Huggy wasn’t going to give him grief.

“Well, you sound like someone who used to come in here with a certain blond cop.”

Starsky sighed. “Look, I know, Huggy. And I’ll tell you what happened when I get back to town.” He paused, unsure how his questions might be taken. “Have you seen Hutch? Is he… how is he?”

“Oh, no, Starsky. You want any information about Hutch, you call him, not me. So if that was the purpose of your call, I have dusting to do.”

Hearing the anger and hurt in his friend’s voice told Starsky he had a lot to make up for. And not just to Hutch. “Huggy, I’m sorry. Things… my life just got crazy. I know I hurt Hutch, and I’ll have to try to repair our friendship… and my friendship with you. I am sorry.”

Huggy held the phone to his ear trying to decide between hanging up and at least listening to one of his oldest friends. “Where are you? Are you in Bay City?”

“Still in New York. But I’m going to fly back to town tomorrow. I wondered if you could pick me up at the airport.”

“You coming back to stay?”

“No.”

“That’s what I thought.”

Starsky could practically see Huggy debating whether to hang up or not. He held his breath. 

“What time is your plane landing?”

“Two. Thank you, Huggy. I promise I’ll tell you what’s happened.”

“Just one thing, Starsk.”

“What?”

“The topic of Hutch is off limits.”

Starsky hesitated then said, “Fair enough. Thanks again, Hug. See you tomorrow.”

Starsky hung up thinking ‘ _that could have gone a lot worse’_.

~*~*~*~*~

Huggy hung up wondering if he should give Max a call to warn him. He heard glass breaking in the kitchen and hurried in there, forgetting about calling Max.

~*~*~*~*~

Max woke up feeling very warm. Hutch had his left leg and arm thrown over Max and his head resting on Max’s chest. He smiled to himself. As much as he wanted to touch and caress Hutch, he tried to lie still so as not to wake him. He hoped Hutch knew who he was in bed with and wasn’t thinking it was Starsky. Banishing those thoughts, Max relaxed and enjoyed the closeness.

“Mmmmm… Max.”

Max chuckled as he felt Hutch wake up and bury his nose in the middle of his chest.

“Morning, Hutch. Sleep good?”

“Better than good. Thanks to you.” Hutch raised his head and smiled at Max.

“It was my pleasure.”

“No, it was definitely my pleasure!” Hutch laughed. “And now, I’d like to return the favor.” He leaned down to kiss Max.

Breaking away from the kiss after a few minutes, Max replied, “I’m not into keeping score, Hutch. What would you like?”

“Truthfully?”

“Yes. I hope you will always tell me the truth.”

“I want you to make love to me. I want to feel you inside me… “

Max closed his eyes for a moment to absorb those words. “Hutch, are you sure? I want nothing more than to make love to you. But I don’t want to do something because you think it’s what I want.”

“Max… it’s what I want. Honest. I… I remember the feelings I had for you from before too. I wanted you then. Please?”

“God… yes. I want to please you.”

Reaching over to the nightstand, Max opened the top drawer, rummaged a bit, and pulled out the lube, setting it on the side of the bed.

“Hutch, I want to see your face while we make love. Are you all right with that?”

A smile bloomed on Hutch’s face. “I’d like that.”

Moving closer to Hutch, Max kissed and caressed him. He stroked his hands all over Hutch, finally settling with a hand on his penis, slowly pumping him. As Hutch’s penis grew harder, Max deepened his kisses. Soon both were moaning.

“Show me how you like it, Hutch.”

Max felt Hutch’s right hand settle over the top of his.

Hutch moved their hands on his penis in a rhythm and with a pressure that pleased him the most. As soon as Max was moving as Hutch had shown him, Hutch took his hand away.

Max continued to stroke Hutch’s penis. He was rewarded for his efforts by the blond’s deep moans. He could tell Hutch was getting close. He slowed his strokes and eased the pressure. Moving his hands up Hutch’s body, he began to rub, pull, and lightly pinch Hutch’s nipples.

“I want you, Hutch. So much.”

“I want you too.”

Max got between Hutch’s legs, kissing each as he moved them to make room for himself. He grabbed one of the pillows and helped Hutch raise his hips so he could slip it under Hutch’s lower back. He scooted up until Hutch’s thighs were resting on his. Squeezing some lube onto his fingers, Max circled Hutch’s anus, spreading the lube around it. He slowly inserted one finger and worked at easing the tension in the tight ring of muscle. He reached up with his other hand and gently stroked Hutch’s penis.

When he was able to move his finger easily in and out of Hutch, he slowly inserted a second finger. Hutch clamped down on them and Max had to take deep breaths to keep from coming right then.

“Hutch… I want you so much. I hope I can hold out when I get inside you… so it’s good for you.”

“It will be good for me, Max.”

When Hutch’s body relaxed, Max coated his penis with lube and pressed it gently against Hutch’s anus. He rocked slowly, feeling Hutch’s body giving… accepting him. He groaned, but kept up the rocking motion, watching his penis slowly slip inside Hutch.

“Hutch… oh God, you are so tight… and you feel like warm satin.”

Max reached down and pulled Hutch further up on his thighs. He guided Hutch’s legs up to his shoulders and felt his cock sinking in as far as it could go. Max’s groan joined with Hutch’s.

Caressing Hutch’s thighs, Max began to slide out, then back in, over and over. He could hear Hutch moaning with each of his slow, deep thrusts. He adjusted his angle a bit and knew when he hit Hutch’s prostate from the way Hutch’s body tightened around his penis.

“So good. Better than I ever imagined. Hot… perfect.”

“Max… please… more… “

Smiling down into Hutch’s face, Max pumped harder and faster, trying to hit that same spot over and over. He turned his head and placed a kiss on the inside of Hutch’s right thigh. “I will… always... have more for you, Hutch.”

Sweat was breaking out on Max’s face. He had been on a fine edge since he realized he would make love to Hutch. So he was working hard to keep from coming before he made Hutch come. He dropped his right hand and took hold of Hutch’s penis. He stroked in rhythm with his thrusts.

Hutch lifted his hips, trying to take Max even deeper.

Feeling Hutch’s move, Max lost his tenuous hold on his control. He thrust harder and faster into Hutch. He’d wanted to prolong this… make it last… but being deep inside Hutch was proving too much for him.

He felt Hutch’s penis began to spasm at the same time he felt Hutch’s body tightening around his penis. He managed to thrust a few more times.

“Max! Can’t hold… on… “

“Let go… I’m with you… “

Pushing as deep as he could, Max pumped Hutch’s penis one more time, feeling it jerk in his hand. He tried to keep his eyes open to watch Hutch, but his own orgasm overwhelmed him and he had to close them briefly. 

When Max opened his eyes, it was to see Hutch’s face flushed with pleasure. He carefully moved Hutch’s legs down, then pulled out. Hutch’s body flinched when he did. Removing the pillow from under Hutch’s back, Max eased out from between his legs and crawled up the bed to lie beside Hutch.

“Hutch… I’m sorry… I was too rough. I didn’t… “

“It… you were… amazing.”

Leaning down, Max kissed Hutch deeply. “You were so worth waiting for.”

Forcing himself to get out of the bed, Max walked to the bathroom and quickly cleaned himself. Then he ran warm water over a washcloth and returned to the bedroom to clean Hutch. It relieved him to note no bleeding around Hutch’s anus.

He tossed the cloth toward the laundry basket sitting by the bathroom door. Then he laid back down beside Hutch, wrapping his arms around him.

“You doing okay?”

“Better than okay. Stop worrying, Max. I… I’m all right. This might take a while to get used to, but it’s gonna be… thank you, Max. For understanding. For not pushing. For being my friend. And now… for being my lover.” Hutch pulled Max close and kissed him.

“You ready for some breakfast?” Max didn’t want to leave the bed but wanted to let Hutch set the tone for the day.

“Not yet. I want to stay here, in bed, with you. I feel so relaxed.”

“No one said breakfast has to be eaten in the early morning. I kind of like the idea of brunch. That gives me more time to lay here beside you and kiss you.” Suiting actions to words, Max kissed Hutch with slow, deep kisses.

Settling back beside Hutch, Max pulled him closer. He reached down, snagged the sheet and cover, and pulled them up. Closing his eyes he basked in the afterglow and the warmth coming off Hutch. 

Both were soon sleeping, wrapped up in each other.

~*~*~*~*~

The phone ringing woke them up about an hour later.

Max reached out and lifted the receiver, handing It to Hutch.

“Hello?”

Max laid still. He wondered if he should get out of bed and allow Hutch his privacy. But he stayed where he was.

“When? Okay, thanks, Hug.”

When Hutch handed Max the receiver, Max hung it up. Hutch said nothing, so Max stayed quiet too.

“Starsky’s coming back to Bay City.”

“To stay?” Max tried hard to make his comment neutral.

“No. To make arrangements to clean out his apartment. And to

talk to Dobey.”

“When?”

“This afternoon. He called Huggy to pick him up.”

“Hutch…”

“It’s okay, Max. I doubt he’ll call me. Or come over.”

“What do you want to do?”

“Not sure yet. Is the offer of brunch still on the table?”

“Yes. Won’t take long to get it ready.”

“Why don’t you take a quick shower, then while you fix lunch, I’ll shower.”

Max took the hint that Hutch wasn’t ready to shower together. “Sounds like a good plan.” He gave Hutch a quick kiss then got out of bed and headed to the bathroom, giving Hutch some space to think about Starsky’s return to Bay City.

When he came out of the shower, Max saw Hutch sitting on the side of the bed. He walked over, grabbed his clothes and got dressed. “I’ll go start brunch. Why don’t you get your shower done, then we can eat?”

Hutch looked up. “Thank you, Max. I know this is all… “

“We’ll work it out.”

Max walked to the kitchen and heard the shower come on in the bathroom.

“Damn you, Starsky.”

As he cursed Starsky, he made a cheese, egg, and ham casserole. It was quick and easy. He took some of his anger out on the milk and eggs, beating them fast and hard. After he put the casserole in the oven, he stood leaning against the sink, looking out the window.

He liked Starsky, but right now if he saw him, he’d have to restrain himself from punching him in the face.

The timer dinged just as Max heard the shower turn off. He pulled the casserole from the oven and put it on a potholder in the center of the table. He put bread in the toaster and filled two glasses with orange juice. By the time Hutch walked out of the bedroom, fully dressed, the table was set and brunch was ready.

“Something smells great in here.” Hutch walked to the table and looked at the casserole. “What’s in that? It smells delicious!.”

“Eggs, milk, cheese, ham, and a few spices. Sit down. It’s best when it’s fresh from the oven.”

They sat and filled their plates.

“Careful, it’s really hot, just came out of the oven.”

Hutch cut a bite, blew on it twice, and put it in his mouth. He closed his eyes and swallowed.

“This is great, Max!”

“Thank you. My grandmother taught me to make it. It’s one of my favorite breakfasts.”

“This the grandmother that makes you keep your accent?”

“One and the same.” Max laughed, but he was touched that Hutch remembered that from the last time they had worked together.

As they were finishing eating, Hutch looked up at Max. “I think I want to get out of town while Starsky’s here. Is that being a coward?”

“You? A Coward? No. I can understand why you’d want some space between you right now. You want me to go with you?”

“Not this time. But I think you might like this place. It’s up in the mountains. Small cabin by a little stream. Great bass fishing. Friendly town close by. I’ve been there a couple of times. While you were showering, I called, and the place is available. “

“Sounds like a great place… for you to be for a few days.”

Hutch smiled at Max, grateful for his understanding.

“Go pack. I’ll clean up from our brunch.”

“Thanks, Max.”

“You’re welcome. But I do want the number to reach you. And I want you to call me when you get there. Deal?”

“Deal.”

Hutch came out of the bedroom carrying one bag. He set it on the couch and walked into the kitchen. When he was behind Max, he wrapped his arms around him. Leaning in, he kissed the back of Max’s neck.

“Hey! No fair when my hands are dripping dish water!” Max dried his hands and turned to pull Hutch close. He kissed him deeply then stepped back. “Have a safe trip. Remember to call me so I don’t worry.”

“Okay, Mom! I left the number of the guy who owns the cabin on the coffee table. And I’ll call you when I get there. Max… thank you… for understanding.”

“I do understand, Hutch. And you are welcome.”

Max watched Hutch walk out of the apartment. He wanted to run after him and tell him to wait so he could pack and go along, but he knew Hutch needed some space to work everything out. He walked back to the kitchen and finished cleaning up from their brunch.

When he was done, he drove to his hotel, packed up his stuff, and paid his bill. He planned on staying with Hutch for the next week, at least. Then they’d talk it over. His boss had told him he’d okay a transfer if it was what Max wanted.

It was what Max wanted, but he wanted to talk to Hutch about it first. 

~*~*~*~*~

Starsky took a cab to the Locke’s. He rang the doorbell and when the door opened; he caught Davie in his arms. “Hey, slugger!” He hugged the little boy and walked toward the staircase with him in his arms.

“Papa!”

When they got to the top of the stairs, Starsky turned to walk to Davey’s room. “Papa has to leave for a few of days, so I thought I’d read a few books to you. How’s that sound?”

“Good.”

Starsky didn’t see Ashley, so he went straight to Davey’s room. He set the boy on his feet and told him, “Go pick out some books, son.”

I have a son! He was almost overwhelmed with all the emotions he felt flowing through him. He might not love Ashley, but he adored Davey, and would do whatever he could to make his son feel loved.

“Read, Papa!”

He took the handful of books from Davey and sat in the big overstuffed chair. Davey immediately climbed up in his lap, dragging his blanket with him. Starsky tucked the blanket around Davey and picked up the first book.

“’The Little Engine That Could’. Sounds like a great book, son.”

When he reached the end of the third book, he picked up the next book in the stack. “What’s this book, Davey?”

“Me. Davey’s book, Papa!”

Starsky read the cover of the cloth-covered book, “’My Baby Book’. This is about when you were born?”

“Ya, Papa!”

Opening the book, Starsky had to take some deep breaths when he saw the picture of Davey in a bassinet, obviously newly born. He ran his fingers over the picture, wishing he could have been there.

“Read, Papa.”

Turning the page, Starsky found a birth announcement and began to read, “David Alan Locke was born at 6:40 AM on the 21st of April,19…“ Starsky suddenly stopped reading, his mind flashed back to when he had been in New York. When he had had sex with Ashley.

“What are you doing with Davey’s baby book?! How dare you intrude into his first days! Who gave you that book?!”

“Davey wanted me to read ‘ _his book’_. He handed it to me.”

Isa walked into the room, drawn by the raised voices. “Let me take Davey. It’s almost time for his bath.”

Starsky handed the little boy to her. “Thank you, Isa. You’ve done a great job with him. I hope you will continue to be here for him.” He smiled at her.

“Thank you. Mr. Starsky. He’s the joy of my life.”

As soon as Isa walked out of the door, Starsky turned back to Ashley who had grabbed the baby book and was clutching it in her arms. She seemed to have calmed herself.

“I have one question for you, Ash.” When she said nothing, he continued, “Just how many months were you pregnant?”

“Nine months. Just like every other mother.” She tipped her face up, almost daring him to argue with her.

“Do you remember when we made lo… had sex? I do. I remember it clearly. So if Davey is my son, you were pregnant for over a year! Why? How could you do this to me… to your own son?”

Ashley began to cry. Huge tears rolled down her cheeks.

“Turn off the waterworks, Ash. Your tears can’t change this. You totally disrupted my life. Lied! And what is that little boy supposed to think when ‘ _Papa’_ isn’t here anymore?! You disgust me. If I thought it would do any good, I’d turn you into the authorities for child abuse!” Starsky kept his voice down, but was practically growling by the time he finished.

“You can’t leave! You promised to marry me! You accepted daddy’s job offer!”

“All under false pretenses. Find some other patsy for your plans, Ash. But you might want to think about Davey first, instead of yourself. I’m leaving, flying back to Bay City. Do not call me again.”

“David! Please?”

“You need help, Ash. For Davey’s sake, I hope you get it.”

Starsky walked out of the room. He saw Isa standing in the hallway. “Please take care of Davey. Give him all the love you can. It’s a safe bet that cold-hearted viper in there won’t.”

“I’m so sorry, Mr. Starsky. I will love Davey the same way I always have, with my whole heart.”

Leaning in, Starsky kissed Isa’s cheek. “Thank you.”

Then he turned, walked down the stairs, and straight to the limo that waited there.

“Take me back to my mother’s place, please, Charles.”

“Of course, Sir.”

Starsky held himself rigidly in the back of the limo. He was having trouble believing what he had just found out. To discover Davey wasn’t his son was devastating. He loved Davey so much. He closed his eyes against the burning he felt.

When they pulled up to his mother’s apartment building, Charles got out and opened the door for Starsky.

“Mr. Starsky, I’m so sorry about this. Isa called me to tell me. She and I love that little boy so much. We’ll keep an eye on him… and Ashley. I promise. This will be hard on Davey. It’s obvious he adores you. I… I’m sorry.”

“Thank you, Charles. It makes me feel better knowing Isa and you are watching out for him.” Starsky reached out and shook the man’s hand. Then he walked into the building.

~*~*~*~*~

“Davey? Why are you back so early? Your plane doesn’t leave for… “

“Ma. I… I don’t know how to tell you… “

“Just tell me, son.”

“Ashley lied. Davey isn’t my son. She wanted to marry me, so she made up the whole story of me being his father.”

“Oh! I’m so sorry. And that poor little boy! I know he fell in love with you. How could she do something like this? How could she hurt that innocent child?”

“I don’t know, Ma. I don’t know. But I did the same thing to Hutch. He was innocent in all this and I hurt him. I just hope I can get him to forgive me.”

“He loves you, David. He’ll forgive you.”

“I hope so, Ma, I hope so.

”~*~*~*~*~

As Hutch drove, he thought about everything that had happened. He felt anger at Starsky. His lover should have called him. He should have told him why he was going to New York. He should have told him about his son. Anger and sadness poured through him as he remembered his phone call with Starsky’s mother. His fingers tightened on the steering wheel.

Then he thought about Max. And making love with him last night. His fingers loosened.

He didn’t know what to think, really. He loved Starsky, but it would seem that was over. And Max? He knew Max had serious feelings for him.

Did he feel the same feelings for Max?

Or was this a rebound thing?

Tired of thinking, Hutch turned on the radio, hoping it would distract him. He turned the dial until a local station came through the speakers. The news was on. He listened as he continued the drive.

“And in local news… be alert and on the lookout for a dark green Chevrolet Nova. It’s being driven by two white men wanted for questioning in several robberies. The men are suspected of robbing small stores and killing those working in the stores. If you see this car, do not approach, call the local police.”

Music started playing and Hutch found himself humming along. He was getting close to the town and was looking forward to some quiet time so he could think.

He had a lot to think about.

~*~*~*~*~

Starsky caught a cab to the airport. His flight wasn’t full, so they were all seated and leaving the gate a few minutes early. He had no one sitting beside him. As he watched the New York airport falling away beneath the plane, Starsky tried to clear his mind.

But it didn’t work very well.

Ashley and Davey kept dancing through his brain. And, as always, Hutch was there, front and center.

He closed his eyes, trying to relax, but his thoughts kept swirling. 

What was he going to say to Hutch?

And how would Hutch respond?

_~*~*~*~*~_

By the time Hutch reached Shallow Creek, his mood had lightened. Getting away, into the mountains always had that effect on him. The clean air and aroma of the pine trees soothed something inside him.

Seeing the small combination grocery store/gas station, Hutch slowed and pulled into the lot. He was going to pick up some food, fish bait, then fill his car up with gas. He also needed to call Max and let him know he had made it safely. He got out of his car and headed inside the store, pulling a handful of change out of his pocket, then turning to the pay phone just inside the door.

~*~*~*~*~

“Thanks for picking me up, Huggy.” Starsky tossed his bag in the back seat of Huggy’s car.

“You’re welcome. Where to?”

“My place. I need to get my car. Then I want to go over to Hutch’s and talk to him. I’ll talk to Dobey tomorrow. Hutch comes first.”

“Starsky. I’m not sure you’ll be welcome at Hutch’s. Why don’t you give it a day or two?”

“I have to talk to him. Tell him how sorry I am. Try to fix what I messed up. Have you talked to him?”

“Off limits.”

“Sorry. I just… well, sorry.”

The ride to his apartment was quiet. He could feel the anger Huggy was holding in. He had a lot to make up for. And not just to Hutch. He’d hurt Huggy too. And Captain Dobey. His next few days wouldn’t be easy.

Huggy pulled up in front of Starsky’s apartment and left the motor running. Starsky got the hint and grabbed his bag from the back of the car. “Thanks Huggy. I really appreciate it.”

“Welcome.” Huggy paused then continued, “It is good to have you back in town.”

Starsky watched the car disappear. “Maybe things won’t be as hard as I thought.”

He bounded up the steps and into his apartment. Dropping the bag on the floor he hurried to the phone. He dialed Hutch’s number by heart and waited to hear Hutch’s soft voice.

~*~*~*~*~

Max left his packed bags in Hutch’s bedroom and went to the kitchen to finish up the breakfast dishes. He looked at the clock when the phone rang. It was early. Hutch must have made great time. He grabbed a towel, dried his hands and hurried to the phone.

“Hey! You made good time!”

“Hutch?” Starsky didn’t think that was Hutch’s voice. Had he dialed wrong?

Max closed his eyes. He recognized Starsky’s voice.

“Hello, Starsky. It’s Max. Hutch isn’t here now. I’ll tell him you called.” Max started to hang up the phone when he heard Starsky yell.

“Wait!! What are you doing there? Where’s Hutch?”

“I’ve been staying with Hutch. And you don’t deserve to know where Hutch is. Goodbye, Starsky.”

“Max!”

But all Starsky heard was the phone disconnecting. He almost picked it back up and called again, but figured Max would unplug it. He grabbed his keys and ran out of his apartment, down the stairs, and into the Torino. 

He was pleased and amazed when the car started right up. “That’a girl! We need to go find out what’s going on at Hutch’s.”

Driving just over the posted speed limits, it didn’t take Starsky long to get to Hutch’s place. He ran up the stairs, opened the door and stepped into Hutch’s apartment.

Max whirled, pulling his gun when he heard the door fly open. Seeing Starsky standing there shouldn’t have surprised him.

“That’s a real good way to get shot. Don’t you knock?”

“Not at Hutch’s, I don’t. Where is he? I need to talk to him.”

Thankful that Hutch had known to leave town, Max smiled at Starsky. “Hutch took off for a couple of days. We had a stakeout, and he wanted some time to rest up.”

“So tell me where he is. I want to talk to him.”

Max smiled. “I told you on the phone, you don’t deserve to know where Hutch is. Besides, I know he doesn’t want to talk to you. Close the door on your way out.” Max holstered his gun and turned to go back into the kitchen.

Starsky saw red. He stepped up behind Max, grabbed his shoulder, and spun him around. “Look! I want to know where he is… right now! What the hell are you doing here, if Hutch isn’t here?”

Knocking Starsky’s hand off his shoulder, Max said, “I told you once that surprising someone like that will get you shot. Try that one more time, and I’ll have to assume that’s what you want!”

Starsky tried to keep his anger in check. “Why are you here, if Hutch isn’t?”

“I’ve been staying with Hutch since the stakeout ended. Staying… and sleeping… with him.”

“You bastard!!” Starsky started toward Max with murder in his eyes.

Max calmly pulled his gun again and stepped back a step. His voice was deadly calm when he said, “Please… make me use this. After the way you hurt Hutch, it would give me great pleasure to shoot you.”

Max saw the moment Starsky realized he had to stay calm if he wanted to find out anything about Hutch.

Starsky took a step back and held up his hands. “Sorry, it’s been a long day. Look, just tell me where Hutch is. I need to talk to him. A lot of stuff has happened, and he needs to hear about it from me.”

“ _Now_ you want to talk to him? But you couldn’t take the time to talk to him before you left town. Nor any of the days you’ve been gone?”

“Hutch and I can work this out. I’m sure he’s a little hurt…“

“A little hurt?!” Max shook his head. “You left him. He was devastated. _You_ didn’t even tell him. He had to find out from your mother.”

“And you were just waiting for a chance to move in on him!”

“No, he told me he loved you when we worked together before. And I respected that. I respected him. Which is more than you can say!”

“I went back East to own up to my responsibilities!”

“What about your responsibilities to Hutch!?”

Max saw Starsky take a step toward him. He saw the intent to do some damage. He braced himself.

The phone rang.

Quickly picking up the phone, Max said, “Hey! You got there already? Everything okay?”

Starsky stood listening to Max’s half of the conversation.

“Yeah, you made good time. Here? Everything’s fine here. You concentrate on you. What? What did you say, Hutch?”

Max could hear Hutch talking low, but couldn’t make out what he was saying. It sounded like Hutch dropped the handset. “Hutch? Hutch!?”

“What?! What’s going on?” Starsky moved closer. 

~*~*~*~*~

Smiling, Hutch turned to look out the store window.

“Shit… “

He could hear Max calling his name, but he had to figure out what to do, and do it quickly.

The green Nova was in the parking lot. How had he missed it when he pulled in and parked?

He knew the minute he turned around, he would probably be shot. He quickly switched the handset to his left hand, raising his voice to say, “Let me get a piece of paper and a pen.” Reaching under his jacket, he grabbed his gun.

Several things happened at the same time Hutch turned with his gun in his hand. A woman screamed from the back of the store, Hutch yelled, “Down!” He saw the clerk being held at the front of the store drop to the floor. Hutch fired, hitting the robber in the chest.

Hutch felt pain explode in the back of his head. His vision was graying out. He was falling. He managed to twist and fire at the man who had snuck up behind him. His shot hit him in the chest.

As he eyes closed, and he started to fall, he saw both Starsky and Max. He breathed out one word, “Help”.

Darkness surrounded him.

~*~*~*~*~

“What happened? It sounded like gunshots!”

“It was.” Max knew something terrible had gone down. “I’m heading up there.”

“Not without me, you’re not!”

“Then let’s go. I’ll radio Dobey on the way.”

Both men ran down the stairs. Starsky started toward the Torino, but Max had gotten into his car and started it. So Starsky quickly ran to jump into the other car before Max left without him.

“We could have taken my car.”

“Mine’s faster and I know I have a full tank of gas.”

Starsky decided not to press the issue, because he didn’t know if the Torino’s tank was full or not.

Picking up the radio mic, Max spoke. “This is Zebra three, patch me through to Dobey. It’s an emergency.”

“Patching you through now, Zebra three.”

“Dobey here. Hutch?”

Starsky remained quiet while Max talked to Dobey. It made sense that Max used the ‘Zebra three’ call sign, because… well, because he had quit.

“It’s Max, Captain. Hutch took off for Shallow Creek this morning. He was going to do some fishing, clear his head. He called a few minutes ago from a small grocery store. While we were talking, he said something I couldn’t understand, then there were gunshots.”

“Hutch?”

“I didn’t hear any more from him, Sir. Could you contact the police department there, get them rolling? And an ambulance?”

“I’ll get right on it, Max. You heading that way?”

“Yes. Starsky is with me. It’ll take us a couple hours to get there. Please let us know… what you find out.”

“Will do. Drive safe, Max. Dobey out.”

“Zebra three out.”

They hit the interstate and Max turned on the sirens. “The MARS light is… “

“I got it.” Starsky rolled his window down and put the light in place on the roof of the car.

Max knew he was impressing Starsky with his driving. He skillfully moved from lane to lane, passing slower cars and those that didn’t yield to the siren and light.

“What did you hear?”

“Hutch was talking. It sounded like he turned, to look out a window, or around the store? I don’t know. Then, it sounded like he said ‘shit’ and something about a paper and pen. I think he was using that to cover for him reaching for his gun. Then I heard at least two shots.”

“Then?”

Max took a deep breath and blew it out. “Then it sounded like Hutch moaned, like something hurt him. And it… sounded like he fell. There were screams in the background. A lot of noise. Then the line went dead.”

Both men lapsed into silence. Each thinking about what might have happened. Each worried about Hutch.

“Dobey to Zebra three. Come in.”

Grabbing the mic before Starsky could, Max replied, “Zebra three. Go ahead, Captain Dobey.”

“Police chief in Shallow Creek reports Hutch interrupted a robbery in progress. Two men wanted for several other robberies. They targeted small stores. Would rape and kill women working in the stores. He reports from witness statements that Hutch shot one robber. The second man came up behind Hutch and hit him in the back of the head. As Hutch was falling, he was able to twist and shoot the second robber, killing him.”

“And Hutch?”

“Is at the local hospital. Witnesses reported one robber striking him. When Hutch twisted to shoot the man, he was fell. The back of his head hit a steel shelf. Then the tile floor. EMT’s reported he lost a lot of blood on site. He’s being evaluated at the hospital. It’s a small one, but modern. They handle a lot of tourist accidents. The chief reports Hutch is in good hands.”

“Has he regained consciousness?”

“Not yet. As soon as I finish a few things here, I will head up that way. South precinct will fly me up in their chopper.”

“Thanks, Captain. We’ll see you there.”

~*~*~*~*~

They were off the freeway, on a two-lane road when Starsky began to speak.

“Look, Max. I appreciate you helping Hutch, but I’m back now and you can go back home.”

Max snorted. “Dream on, Starsky. I’m not going anywhere.”

“I still love Hutch. I never stopped.”

“Yeah, you love him _so_ much, you left him without even calling him.”

“Ashley told me she had had my baby.”

“And Hutch had your back for how many years?”

“You don’t understand, Max… ”

“Oh, I understand perfectly. You loved Hutch until something better came along, then you dumped him without a qualm. Just walked away.”

“It wasn’t like that!”

“Sure looked like that to me.”

“You don’t know… “

“Just shut up, Starsky and watch for the turnoff to Shallow Creek.”

Both men lapsed into silence.

Both thinking of all the things they still wanted to say.

~*~*~*~*~

Max saw the turnoff for Shallow Creek and took it. A few miles down the road he spotted the small grocery store on his left. There were still police cars in the parking lot.

“Is that…?”

“Yeah, Starsky. Jamison’s. That’s the one Hutch told me about.”

“Should we stop?”

“I’ll drop you off if you want to stop, but I’m heading for the hospital.”

“I wanted to see if I could pick up Hutch’s gun.”

“I’m sure the police have it and will have to clear it before they release it.”

The hospital was on the left side of the street, and Max turned into the parking lot, close to the emergency room entrance. Both men got out of the car and hurried through the sliding doors.

“Max. Starsky. Glad you got here.” As both men started to ask questions, Captain Dobey cut them off. “He’s as stable as they can get him right now. He hasn’t awakened yet. The doctor is very concerned about the trauma he sustained.

“He received three blows to the back of his head. One from the robber, one from a steel shelf he hit while falling, and the last from the tile floor. He has a large laceration to the back of his head and lost a significant amount of blood at the store.

“The doctor said head wounds bleed worse than most others. They have blood on hand, if he needs a transfusion, but for now, he doesn’t think Hutch needs it.”

“Cap’n, where is he? I need to… “

“Captain Dobey,” Max interrupted Starsky, “How soon can I see him?”

“They're doing another scan to see if they need to do surgery to relieve the pressure on his brain. If they don’t have to do surgery, they’ll move him to intensive care. Doctor said it would be about half an hour before they know.”

Captain Dobey motioned them to sit in the plastic chairs near the wall. “The chief of police said he’d be coming over as soon as he’s finished with the scene at the store. We might as well sit while we wait.”

Max sat in the chair closest to the entrance to the room where Hutch was being treated.

Starsky took a chair two chairs away from Max.

Dobey shook his head and sat in the chair between them.

They had been sitting for about twenty minutes when a local police officer walked in and over to where they were sitting.

“Captain Dobey, I’m Police Chief, Dan Everson. Nice to meet you, Sir. I just wish it were under better conditions. Any news on your officer?”

The men greeted the police chief.

Dobey shook his hand. “No news yet. They are doing another brain scan.” He noticed Dan held a holster and gun. “Is that Hutch’s?”

“Yes, we have four witnesses who all gave us the same description of what happened. I thought I would return it to you.”

Starsky had stood and reached out for the gun.

Max stepped between Starsky and Dan. “I’ll take that. Hutch is my partner.”

“I’ll take it, Dan. Thank you. I’ll see that he gets it back when this is all over.” Captain Dobey reached out and took the holster and gun.

Starsky and Max glared at each other before sitting back down.

“I have to go to the station and write up my report. Please let me know if… well, how your officer is doing. He saved four lives today, and who knows how many more lives. If those two had gotten away. He’s a hero in a lot of eyes around here, most notably in the eyes of the families of the store workers and customers.”

He gave Dobey a card with his phone numbers on it. “Call me if… ”

Dobey took the card and put it in his pocket. He shook the man’s hand. “I will. Thank you again.

“Take care.” Dan nodded to the three men and left.

~*~*~*~*~

An hour later a doctor came out of the emergency room. All three men stood up.

“I’m Doctor Stevens. Wish we were meeting under better circumstances. Captain Dobey, Hutchinson is being transferred to the intensive care unit. For now, we don’t believe he’ll need surgery, but we will monitor his vitals closely. He hasn’t awakened yet, but with head traumas, that’s not always unexpected.”

“Thank you, Doctor Stevens. This is Hutchinson’s partner, Max Collins. And this is David Starsky, a friend.”

“We’ll let you know as soon as he is settled.”

~*~*~*~*~

Forty minutes later a nurse came out and walked up to Captain Dobey. She nodded at Starsky and Max.

“We’ve moved Hutchinson to the intensive care unit. At this point doctor said he is stable. He has not regained consciousness yet. I’ll take you to his room. Please keep it quiet when in the room. There is a waiting room there, or we can put chairs in his room if you would like. Follow me, gentlemen.”

~*~*~*~*~

Each man was lost in their thoughts as they walked to the Intensive Care Unit.

Captain Dobey was worried that this might be the time his detective’s luck may have run out. He didn’t know how Starsky, or Max, would react should Hutch not make it.

Starsky was kicking himself for believing Ashley. He should have demanded some kind of proof. A blood test. Anything. And he should have called Hutch. What if he never got the chance to apologize?

Max was thinking, “I shouldn’t have let him come alone. We just got started. It can’t be over. Not like this.”

~*~*~*~*~

When they got to the room where Hutch was, Captain Dobey waved Max and Starsky to chairs in the waiting room. He wanted a chance to see Hutch first. Ask a few questions of the staff he could see working on Hutch.

Max and Starsky walked over by the chairs, but neither sat. Both wanted to be in the room with the man they loved.

Starsky turned to Max and said, “You can head on back to Bay City. I’ll drive Hutch back in his car when he’s released.”

“Nice try. But I’m not leaving until I have Hutch in my car, driving him back to our place.”

The ‘our place’ was not lost on Starsky.

Captain Dobey stepped out of the door and motioned for them to come in. He stopped them just outside the door.

“I’m expecting you two to be on your best behavior.”

Both men nodded and followed him into the room

Captain Dobey moved to the left side of Hutch’s bed, up near his head. Max stood on the opposite side, and Starsky moved around to stand by Captain Dobey. 

Max reached out and brushed Hutch’s hair back from the bandage wrapped around his head. “Hey, Hutch, it’s Max. I’m here. So is Captain Dobey. You’re gonna be okay. Rest and heal. We’ll be here. “

Max looked across the bed and could tell that Starsky didn’t like it that he hadn’t mentioned Starsky’s name.

“Captain Dobey… let me change places with you.” Starsky couldn’t move past Dobey because there wasn’t that much space between the wall and them.

“You’re fine where you are, Starsky.”

Three nurses came in the room each carrying a chair which they set up just inside the door to the room. Max quickly grabbed one, moved it to the head of Hutch’s bed, and sat down.

Starsky pulled one up beside Max’s and sat.

Captain Dobey remained standing.

“Why don’t you go grab us something to drink, Max.” Starsky wanted Max to move from where he was sitting.

“If you’re thirsty, go get something. Captain Dobey and I will wait here.”

“Look… I haven’t seen Hutch since I left Bay City. I want a chance to talk to him.”

“So talk. I’d love to hear your explanation for why you left him the way you did.” Max kept his hand on Hutch’s arm, but turned his face to look at Starsky.”

“You know what happened, Max. I had obligations in New York.”

“You had obligations _here_.”

“I had a responsibility to my son!”

“What about your responsibility to _Hutch_!?”

“You don’t know what happened.”

“I know you packed up and left. Without bothering to call Hutch. And you stayed in New York without calling. Correct me if I’m wrong, but don’t they have phones there?”

“I wasn’t sure what I was going to do. How I was going to handle everything!”

“It’s always all about you, isn’t it Starsky. Never mind how much you hurt Hutch, as long as _you_ get what _you_ want.” Max shook his head and looked back at Hutch.

Captain Dobey watched the two. He didn’t know what to say to either of them.

“And now, _you’re_ trying to make it all about _you_! You and Hutch.” Starsky wanted to punch the smug part-Russian bastard.

“I could have had him before. When you were in New York the last time. Is that when you met and slept with that woman?”

“Shut up! You never had a chance with him then. He loved _me_!”

“And yet, when New York called this time, you left him again! How many times do you think Hutch will forgive you?”

“He loves me. He knows I love him.” Starsky tried to sound convincing.

“I sure hope you never fall in love with me. Not sure I could handle _how_ you show your love.” Max had turned loose of Hutch’s arm and was turned in his chair facing Starsky.

Dobie felt Hutch’s other hand move in his. He looked away from the two men and their argument. He glanced at Hutch’s face and saw a tear slip out of his left eye.

In a firm but quiet voice he told the two men, “Both of you, out of here.” When they remained seated but looked at him he added, “Now! That’s an order.”

“Technically, Cap’n, I don’t work for…”

“Then I’ll call hospital security to toss you out of here! Leave!”

Starsky and Max both stood and walked back out to the waiting room, still tossing verbal jabs at each other.

Dobey hoped it wouldn’t come to blows.

He looked back down but Hutch didn’t show any signs that he was waking up. “Hutch, it’ll be okay, son. Forget about those two clowns for now. Concentrate on getting better. I’ll keep them in line.” He muttered quietly, “Somehow.”

~*~*~*~*~

Hutch hurt.

His head felt like it was going to explode. Or had it all ready exploded and someone had put it back together? He could hear voices. He struggled to make them clearer.

Starsky?

But wasn’t Starsky in New York?

Max’s voice. Max was here with him.

So was Starsky?

They were arguing. Talking about him. About who loved him and who didn’t. As he listened to them, he felt a coldness surround him. Was he just some prize that both wanted to claim?

Did either of them really love him?

He felt a tear form and leak out of his left eye.

Then he heard another voice. Captain Dobey was here too. He was kicking Starsky and Max out of his… his what? Where was he? Why couldn’t he open his eyes?

Pressure was building in his head. It felt like it was going to explode again. Hutch wondered if he would live through it if it happened a second time.

He welcomed the darkness that crept over him.

~*~*~*~*~utHut

Captain Dobey walked out to the waiting room. There were visitors there for other patients in the intensive care unit. Starsky was sitting on one side of the room and Max was on the other.

Dobey knew that Starsky and Hutch had been lovers. He’d known they loved each other probably before they had finally figured it out. And he had known that Max and Hutch had gotten close the last time they had worked together.

So he had figured out that Hutch and Max had started an intimate relationship.

He couldn’t stay in Shallow Creek much longer. But he worried about Starsky and Max. What if their dislike of each other led to a fight?

He saw a couple of small rooms where doctors talked with family members in private. Both had their doors open and were empty.

He walked over to Max and pointed to the first room. “Wait for me in there, Max.” He watched as Max stood and walked into the room.

Stepping across the room, he spoke the same words to Starsky. Then he followed him into the room, shutting the door.

Both men tried to speak and Dobey silenced them with a look.

“I’m pretty sure I know what’s going on between you two. You need to listen to what I am going to tell you.”

Seeing that he had both men’s attention, he continued.

“Starsky, are you staying in New York?”

“No, Captain.”

“Why did you leave so suddenly? Is your mother okay?”

Starsky looked at Max, then to Dobey.

“We’re all in this together. I trust that what is said in here will stay between the three of us. Max? Starsky?”

Both men nodded in affirmation.

“What happened, Starsky? Why the unexpected trip to New York, your resignation, and the equally unexpected return to Bay City?”

“A woman I went out with four years ago called and told me she had gotten pregnant on that date. I flew back to talk to her and meet the boy I thought was my son. It turned out that she lied to me. Davey wasn’t my son after all. So I flew back to Bay City.”

“And you want to rescind your resignation? And partner with Hutch again.”

“Yes, Sir.”

“Max, what were your plans?”

“My Captain is willing to give me a transfer to Parker. I want to remain Hutch’s partner, Sir.”

Captain Dobey shook his head. “I figured that was the situation. Like Solomon, I need to make a decision. I doubt the hospital will let me walk into Hutch’s room with a sword to hack him into two halves.”

Both men looked horrified.

“That just leaves me with words.

“Have either of you considered what Hutch might want? If he survives this, _his wants_ need to a priority. And there is a possibility that Hutch won’t be able to return to being a detective. You have got to stop fighting over him like two dogs with a tasty bone.

“Have I made myself clear?”

Starsky and Max looked at each other, then at Dobey. Both nodded and said, “Yes, Sir.”

“I have to return to Bay City in an hour. I intend to talk to Hutch’s doctor before I leave. I’ll leave instructions with him that you two not be allowed to be in Hutch’s room if any problems arise.

“Hutch needs your support. Not fighting. If he survives, I expect the two of you to accept any choices he may make. Starsky, that means if he wants Max to remain his partner… in every way… you need to respect that. And, Max, the same applies to you should Hutch decide he wants Starsky as his partner at work and home. You two both say you love him… act like it.”

~*~*~*~*~

Starsky and Max silently declared a truce with each other. When they spent time in Hutch’s room, they both talked to Hutch and both touched him. Neither said anything possessive about the injured man.

Doctor Stevens was concerned that Hutch hadn’t shown any signs of waking up yet, but was still optimistic for him to regain consciousness. He knew the two men keeping Hutch company were worried so he answered their questions as positively as he could.

Bond by their common love and concern for Hutch, Max and Starsky began to talk without rancor. Each shared stories about Hutch as a partner at work. Each tried to keep the other’s spirits up.

Both men realized they liked the other.

~*~*~*~*~

Hutch had been in a coma for three days. There was no indication of him waking up.. Doctor Stevens still believed it was just a matter of giving his brain time to heal.

Starsky and Max were both tired from spending all their time at the hospital, either in Hutch’s room or catching some sleep in a chair in the waiting room.

“Max?”

Max woke to find a nurse standing beside the chair he was sleeping in. “Yes. I’m Max. Is something wrong?” Max glanced over to see Starsky still asleep in a chair across the room.

“Hutch seems restless. He usually calms down when one of you are with him. I wondered… “

“I’ll go sit by him right now. Thank you.”

The nurse smiled and walked back toward the intensive care unit.

Max stood, stretched, and considered waking Starsky. He decided to check on Hutch and wake Starsky if Hutch didn’t calm down.

When he entered Hutch’s room he could see the tension in Hutch’s body. He pulled a chair close to the head of the bed and sat down. Reaching through the railing on the bed, Max took Hutch’s hand in his.

“Hey, Hutch. It’s Max. I’m here. You’re going to be okay. Take it easy, babe. Doc says you’re going to be fine. Relax, Hutch. Starsky is out in the waiting room getting some sleep. He’s been here the whole time, too.”

“Starsk.”

“Hutch?! Are you awake?” Max didn’t know if he should call the nurse or not. Then he realized Hutch was still sleeping.

‘Starsk. Where are you? I need you. I love you.”

Hutch continued to talk in short comments. All of it about Starsky.

Closing his eyes, Max took a deep breath. He’d always heard that people spoke their true feelings in situations like this one. It hurt to hear Hutch calling for Starsky, but it encouraged Max that Hutch might be getting closer to waking up.

He pushed the button to summon the nurse who came in right away.

“Hutch said some words, but I don’t think he was awake. Kind of like talking in his sleep.”

“That could be a sign he’s waking up. I’ll let Dr. Stevens know.”

“After you’ve talked with him, would you go wake up Starsky? Tell him Hutch might be coming around. Please?”

“I’ll be happy to. Hutch is a lucky man to have such good friends.” She walked out of the room.

“Yeah… he’s lucky.” Max stood, but kept his hand on Hutch’s arm. He bent down and brushed a kiss on Hutch’s cheek. “It’s okay, Hutch, Starsky will be here in a few minutes.” He took a breath. “He still loves you. He didn’t mean to hurt you, Hutch. I think you should talk to him about what happened. And… …I think you should give him another chance.”

Max heard Starsky hurrying into the room.

“Max? Is Hutch…”

“He was talking a little. He said your name. I… I think you might have a better chance of waking him up right now.”

“Max… thank you… I… “

“It’s okay, Starsky. You’re welcome.”

Max turned and walked out of the room, even though he wanted to stay. He needed to give Starsky some time alone with Hutch. For Hutch’s sake.

He walked back out to the waiting room. He didn’t really know what to do now. Part of him wanted to rush back into Hutch’s room and bodily remove Starsky.

But he’d always believed that love was about doing what was best for the one you loved. That’s why he’d walked away the last time he and Hutch had worked together and gotten close. He still believed that.

Mind made up, Max walked to the nurse’s station and asked to borrow a pen and paper.

~*~*~*~*~

Starsky sat beside Hutch’s bed. He reached through the railing to hold Hutch’s hand and caress Hutch’s face.

“Hey, Blondie. I’m here. Max said you’d said my name? He’s a good man. I can see why you would have feelings for him. What’s going on, babe? Are you trying to wake up? That’d be the best thing ever. Come on, Hutch, open those beautiful blue eyes. Come back to me. I need you so much. And I’m so sorry for what I did. Wake up, please? Give me a chance to tell you how sorry I am. And to explain what happened.

“Even if you want to be with Max, I’ll understand. I want you to know how much I still love you. And how sorry I am.”

“Starsk?”

“Hutch!? You awake?”

“Think so.”

“You hurting? Oh, God, Hutch… I was so scared… “

“Head hurts.”

“You tried to break a steel shelf and tile floor with it.”

“The store! Those women?”

“Shhhh. Don’t get excited. They’re fine. You saved them, Hutch.”

Starsky watched Hutch’s eyes close. “Hey, you still with me here?”

“Yeah. Tired. Head hurts.”

“Let me call a nurse. See if you can have something for the pain.”

Starsky walked out to the nurse’s station. “Hutch woke up. He said his head hurts.”

His statement caused a flurry of activity. Two nurses hurried into Hutch’s room while the third picked up a phone to call Doctor Stevens. He walked back into Hutch’s room.

One nurse was talking quietly to Hutch as she injected something in his IV line. The other was checking vitals and writing them in Hutch’s chart. The third nurse walked into the room.

“Well, hello, sleepy head. A lot of people have been waiting for you to wake up.” She turned to include Starsky in her conversation. “Doctor Stevens said he’d be here in fifteen minutes. Debbie just gave you something for your pain. We’re all happy you decided to wake up.” She smiled at Hutch.

“You got that right, Judy.”

Doctor Stevens came rushing into the room and for a few minutes, all of Hutch’s attention was taken by him.

Hutch was answering questions, but Starsky could see he was about to go back to sleep. Before he could say anything, Doctor Stevens spoke.

“I think that’s enough for tonight. Let’s let Hutch get some rest. Plenty of time tomorrow for more talk and questions.”

Everyone filed out of the room except Starsky. He pulled his chair over by the bed. Slipping an arm back through the rail, he slipped his hand into Hutch’s. He felt Hutch squeeze his hand and smiled. “Sleep, babe, just sleep.”

Tiredness and relief hit Starsky at the same time. He leaned back in the chair, braced against the bed rail, and closed his eyes. Before he knew it, he was fast asleep… still holding Hutch’s hand.

~*~*~*~*~

“Good morning, Starsky.”

Starsky opened his eyes and jumped. Doctor Stevens was standing by his side. “Oh… sorry… guess I fell asleep.”

He sat up, then realized Hutch had a tight grip on his hand, so he couldn’t move it. “Sorry, let me get him to let go… “

“It’s okay. I’ll go to the other side of the bed. Hutch, can you hear me?”

Starsky watched as Hutch worked to open his eyes. He held his breath until they opened. Seeing his eyes open and focus was one of the greatest things he’d ever seen.

“Mornin’, Hutch.” He smiled when Hutch looked at him, then down to their joined hands. “You didn’t want to be alone last night.” He shrugged.

Hutch slowly let go of Starsky’s hand, blushing.

Starsky saw him looking around the room.

“I think Max is still snoozing in the waiting room.”

Doctor Stevens spent several minutes talking to and examining Hutch. He stood up straight and said, “If you continue to improve, I think we can move you to a regular room out on the floor, Hutch. I’m very pleased with your progress. You had us worried for a couple of days.”

“Sorry… I… “

“Hey, buddy, you’re awake now. That’s all that matters. You always did like long naps.” Starsky smiled when Hutch blushed again. Those long naps had usually followed one of their intense love-making sessions.

“I’ll be back to see you after lunch, Hutch. If you’re doing okay, I’ll write the orders for you to move to the floor.” Doctor Stevens shook Starsky’s hand and left the room.

Hutch looked up at Starsky. “Max… “

“I’ll go get him. I know he’ll be happy to see you awake.” He stood and walked out of Hutch’s room to the waiting room. Scanning the room, he didn’t see Max. He walked into the men’s bathroom, but it was empty. He walked back into the waiting room.

“Starsky?”

“Oh, hey, Judy. Have you seen Max?”

“Yes, last night. He gave me this to give to you this morning.” She handed Starsky an envelope with his name on it.

“Thanks, Judy. You heading home?”

“Yep. Shift is over. It was a good one. Seeing Hutch wake up was one of the best things about it!”

“It was a great thing!” Starsky leaned in and placed a soft kiss on her cheek. “Thank you, schweetheart! For all you did for him.”

She blushed. “You are such a charmer! So is Max!”

Starsky watched her walk away. He looked around but still didn’t see Max anywhere. He headed back to Hutch’s room.

Looking up when Starsky walked into his room, Hutch noticed Max wasn’t with him. “Where’s Max?”

“Good question.” Starsky sat down beside Hutch’s bed and looked at the envelope Judy had handed him. “Max gave this to Judy to give me this morning. Maybe he got called back to Bay City?”

He opened the envelope and slid the single sheet of paper out of it. Unfolding it, he began to read it to himself.

_“Starsky,_

_I’ve headed back to Bay City. Pretty sure Hutch is awake by now. You were asleep when Judy came out to get me to sit with him because he was restless._

_While I sat there, he started saying things. Things like ‘Starsk. Where are you? I need you. I love you.’_

_And I knew._

_He might have loved me… but not like he loved you._

_We might have made it._

_But, I love him enough to leave... so he and you can fix things up between you._

_I might have made him content. But with you… he’d be truly happy._

_Take care of him, Starsky._

_Give him time. Time to work this all out with you._

_Believe me…_

_He’s worth waiting for._

_Max”_

“What does it say, Starsk?”

Starsky cleared his throat and looked at Hutch. He could just fold up the letter and tell Hutch that Max was headed back to Bay City for an urgent case… But he was finished with any kind of deception to Hutch.

Silently, he handed the letter to Hutch. Watching as the blond read it.

Hutch blinked his eyes a few times, and Starsky saw the sheen of tears there.

“He really loves you, Hutch.”

“I know. And I cared for him.”

“But?”

“Tell me what happened, Starsk. Please?”

Starsky accepted Hutch’s desire to change the subject. So he told him what had happened. Why he had left so suddenly. And why he hadn’t called. It hurt him to talk about Davey, but Hutch deserved to know.

“I am so sorry, Hutch. Sorry I hurt you. Sorry I didn’t talk to you about it, or at least call. I was an idiot. The idea of having a son… “

“I know, Starsk.” Hutch looked away when he said, “If you want a family, I’d understand you leaving. I know I can’t compete with a son or daughter… “

“ _No_ , Hutch! We have Kiko and Molly. They are like our kids anyway. I’m sorry I made you doubt how much you mean to me. I’m sorrier than I can say that I hurt you. Can you forgive me?”

Starsky sat and looked at Hutch, watching as different emotions flashed across his face. He didn’t realize he’d been holding his breath until Hutch spoke.

“I love you, Starsk. I forgive you.”

Starsky closed his eyes and let out the breath he’d been holding in a huff. He dropped his head, but did nothing to hide the tears that escaped his eyes.

“Starsk… ?”

“Yeah… Uh… sorry.” He looked up at Hutch and wiped his cheeks. “Just… I was so worried… I… thank you, Hutch.”

Both men looked at each other, both with tears in their eyes.

“I… we… might need to take a little time… go slowly at first?”

“Hutch, I agree. We need to find our way back to each other.”

“Yes.”

“Ooops! Sorry. You two okay?”

They looked over to see Cindy standing just inside the door.

“Yeah, sorry. A bit emotional… after almost losing him.” Starsky said.

“Well, Doctor Stevens left orders for you to be moved to a private room, and to discontinue your IV and catheter. You up for that, Hutch?”

“Am I ever!”

“Something tells me a private room will suit _both_ of you.

They looked at each other as they said, in unison, “Amen.”

She walked out of the room to collect what she would need to prepare Hutch for his move.

Starsky looked at Hutch, his eyes full of love, and said, “Max was right.”

At Hutch’s confused look, he continued. “You have been and always will be… worth waiting for.”

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Worth Waiting For](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20820308) by [Megabat](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Megabat/pseuds/Megabat)




End file.
